1-1-99

It is my plan for you to seek me by re-reading the pages we had written over the past days.  You can see how efficient I am in the writing of many truths to you in a style of positiveness.  You are doing exactly my will my Son.  You are staying cleansed and obedient to my guidance that will bring you peace and will heal you totally whole again.   You are called to be pure with me for the kingdoms use.  I do not call most this way to these standards.  You are being cleaned again and again of old entanglements, strongholds, and processes that give the evil one a foothold in your life.  Those footholds are gone!  The ideas and attitudes that pull others down quickly are gone from you!  For good – for your good.  Be at peace to know it was my established plan to have you stop your life and wait, and wait, and wait for your body, soul, spirit and mind to heal.  We are truly getting to the end of these times of healing.  I am so pleased with the tremendous results of what we have done.  You do not feel much different except for the phantom feelings that float through your mind now and then.  That was me again establishing your mind and thoughts with a curtain over the flesh reality you could have experienced.  It has not really felt real has it?  I am carefully and lovingly moving you through perception changes and thought process changes while I am healing you.  Draw close to me more and more my sweet child.  The promises I have made to you through all these writings are going to come true.  I am truth.  I am watching.  I care for you.  It will all work for joy and contentment for you my love.

1-2-99

I hear your troubled thoughts my son.  I will address them in our writing.  I want the desires of your heart acknowledged to you as you move through each day with me.  Happily I say with me because you are that, with me, following my guidance as you so truly do.  You will be happier following me  know and you are beginning more and more to see I do know what is best for you.  You have touched my heart with your life my child.  Ph I knew what you were capable of but you have exceeded my dreams of how and what to heal with you.  Truly the experiences have had will help me to help others more, you have forged the way ahead for others to follow. 

The distraction in your thought process is one of the things that bothers you.  My Son I need to try all areas of healing before I move my hand in a situation.  My creation has enormous areas of self healing resources that each on is capable of doing.  Many more than they are aware of.  I had to push you in the area of distraction to self heal as much as possible.  You have carried this aspect with you from your early years.  It is a development process that all go through.  You are behind the times because of this healing and you are aware of the distractible thoughts you have.  I will move now to heal that area of your mind.  This healing will stop the confusion you have been troubled with in your thoughts.  To even write about this distracts you.  Trust in me for a little while longer, I will not push you more now, I see it is time for me to move for you in these areas.  Write more of your thoughts and concerns here on these papers, I care for you and do see you suffer.  What you have viewed as sadness my Son has been in some cases quietness.  That is an aspect I have had to change in your perceptions.  You are still very prone to going too fast.  Your distractible thoughts are an indicator of this.  I have kept you quiet and calm for a time now, not letting other “distractions” get at you.  You have interpreted some of that as sadness and yet you don’t enjoy the quietness.  My Son you have had your mind in such a high gear it hasn’t been able to slow down.  I will move in that area now.  I will reconstruct you to be more quiet at times which will make you more rested so you will be happier.  Again trust in me to heal you.  You will not have to do more of this.  You look at this time as being filled with sadness but in fact it has been filled with quietness to calm you, less distraction to heal you and me to be there to console you.  I will always be here with you my child that is one of my often repeated promises.  You are having trouble getting over the Ill be happier hump.  You block the thoughts I give you and the words I give you with lack of faith.  It is well understood you would be impatient with me for we have gone over this before.  You are hurt, the scare are healing, a person cannot be happy who has been hurt.  Bind all the hurt now and give it to me.  Fill with the Spirit of God and cleanse and cloak.  Good job my Son.  You struggle with the flesh as all my children do my Son but you know what the truths are.  I am giving you all of these words that we write.  The words are for comfort, building up, they are to show kindness, and they are for your exhortation. 

Place the world on hold for a short time longer my Son.  We have gone so far to heal you and it has been so effective for our relationship to do this.  I do believe in you that you will be faithful to me and will be seeking me throughout your life. 

You have made a sacrifice for me in the area of time in your life, a Father knows how to repay his children my Son.  I will recompense you for this agonizing time spent apart from life.  I hear all of those thoughts my Son.  The thoughts you have now touch my heart.  I can only say trust me and Hold to me, believe in me and give yourself and this fight to me.  I will restore you.  I will build you up.  You will be laughing and happy again.  It is the promise Jesus left to you and I have told you of it in my word.  I will provide.

1-3-99

You check with me carefully to be sure to be within my will.  You are within my perfect will my Son.  This time here now will be for healing in a strong degree.  The evil one has been pushing at you today yes but a lot for a long time trying to stop the healing I have been doing and have done in your body and mind.  Now that you look back at the amount of negative thoughts you have had you see it is a bottle for you mind we have been in.  I will hold the enemy back now from his attempts at destroying you.  I will build your strength back up and stop the evil one from robbing you.  I will stop the attacks upon your mind from the arrow and darts. This time was for healing my Son but there was an aspect of trial and training also.  The evil one wants to destroy you in any way he can.  He has netted and webbed all of the attacks upon you so that he would be totally undetectable to you.  You are powerful my Son.  Your Word inspired by my Spirit and with Christ in you sends the enemy away.  I know you are weary of the battle that is supposed to belong to the Lord.  I will fight off the attacks now. 

It is my will for you to be completely healed and strong and back in the life you have been watching go by.  How you have viewed this time away from what you had is giving you distress.  I have told you my child I will recompense you, reward you for what you feel you might have missed.  That is a promise to you.  The time we have spent since the beginning of this writing has been necessary for you, for you are worthy of a healed happy life.  You have pulled close to me all through this and you have had great studies in many areas of you life.  It has not been just the influence of the evil one, or just you flesh fault, or just my will and just the learning that has caused you to remain here – nor was it just the severity of the problem.  It was all of these things and more.  You must face this as being in the past my Son.  The time is almost over mow and you will be free and happy.  It will adjust to you quickly.  Most will notice a difference in you.  Do not Fear!  Do not ever open the door to the evil one with fear!  You have nothing to fear.  Accept the changes in your moods, perceptions, and feelings as for building up and I will not let the enemy tear down any more from you.  I will now erect a blockade around you that I will maintain that will protect your feelings and thoughts from the influence of the evil one.  You have learned well from me while within the compound of the evil one.  The blockade is of the wall of crystal fire of the Holy Spirit.  It will not go away nor will the evil one be able in any way to get through.  My Son you are so sad and discouraged, I am so sorry.  I never intended for you to have had such a deep pit to crawl out of.  I will send my angels to your side to help more with your struggle then they had been doing.  I will give you the dreams and visions you have been thinking of.  My Son you must believe that this time of struggle is coming to a close now.   I have promised and promised you to abide in me and you have.  I must show you some of the power of God that has been waiting for you.  I know you are just feeble flesh and yet you try so hard to be strong.  Let me be your strength as you have been giving it up to me more and more your struggle will not seem so dire and serious to you.  You will feel a building in the next ten days in your feelings and moods as I have promised to you.  I will not allow anything else to get in the way of your much deserved reunion with life.  Your desire for living will return, no more thoughts of apathy.  Your   energy will return, be careful with what I have rebuilt but yet enjoy the strength you feel and the changes that occur.  You will have passion then in your soul which will bring back your wonderful creativity that feeds your thoughts properly.  I will bless the things that you do so they will be fruitful to you and your life.  I will uphold you as you regain the momentum of life.  Stay with me and take time with me as you can so we can continue to grow together.  I am a jealous God.  I must have you happy though.  I will watch and watch.  I will build the blockade now and I will dispatch my angels now.  I move my powerful hand in your life now to bring you to all you must be to what I have planned for you.  These words are my will I am most pleased you have excelled as my creation to seek me in these ways.  I love and do care for you.  My word is my promise one and one half week to be healed.  I will not go deeper or take any longer.  I had to push you my child I had to test the iron.  Trust in me as you have and I will truest in you as I must.  We will grow on together and do the things that have been set apart for you.  I see your heart my Son and Jesus is in it.  I see your Spirit my Son and I am there.  I see your Soul my Son, it is healed.  I see your body my Son, it is restored.  You will be complete child.  Draw near to me and rest with me and you have the best with me.  These are my vows to you.       

1-4-99

You are within my will my child – right within my will.  I tell you I wanted you here with me just as you are to have me heal you and calm you without the distractions of your life here with us.  It is just the sun and my Son.  I did direct you to hear the words from the teaching this morning.  I wanted to show you that like before I am watching all of the things happening to you.  My will as you have found is the perfect will to be done in anyone’s life.  I am training my best creation for the end times.  Do not fear or worry my child I will not let you be hurt.  I have promised this to you and I will keep my promises, my word to my children.  The other part of the promise for you to receive is faith to believe it.  Faith is a gift of the Holy Spirit Son.  Ask for increase of Faith for peace.

The world and the flesh is very difficult to look away from my child, it must be practiced again and again.   The world is all around you and yet the things I ask you to and the way I want you to be is not like it is of this world.  It is a difficult battle with the enemy, your flesh and society as it has developed.  That is why I “call” you to be with me.  The ways of God are not easily followed when you are Spirit filled they truly cannot be followed by someone who is not a believer.  There are traps in the world that hold my creation to the ways of the world.  Wealth is a trap my child.  I have made you personally a pauper with all the feelings that go along with that station in life.  Did you think I don’t see how you are doing?  I am watching even every nuance you have to be sure you are progressing within my will exactly.  I do not miss any of your feelings.  I am keeping track of all of them as only I can so that I will soon know all of the desires of your heart and then I can make them come true for you.  You have given me your God given free will and you have turned away from the ways of this world and you have chosen me.  That is why I am here.  You are not confused, I am directing you in all of your thoughts as I heal your perceptions and restore the mind of Christ that I want you to have.  It is a strong man that endures with the Spirit in the flesh world.  There are reminders of how powerful money and status have become everywhere.  The people that have become attached to money in any way will have to give it up to be with me in these end times.  I have watched the bondage of money tear down the kingdom of God for thousands of years.  The love of money is the root of evil.  The things that money buys are for the world and the here and now.  You my child have learned that you cannot buy the things of God.  They are a gift that is freely given.  The gifts of God cannot be ever sold, they are for each one as a custom order.  My children pay the price for the gifts of God by turning away from the world, that is a cost.  You my Son know the sacrifice and cost of doing this and yet I allocate just what amount of a call is to each child and just what the cost of turning to me will be.  It has hurt to turn away from the world and look only to me hasn’t it Son?  The sacrifices you have made have been for a rebuilding of your mind.  As I have told you in our writings, that was a major healing, much more than you could have ever conceived of.  The roads your life has taken are more difficult than you would have guessed.  I have changed your mind.  Oh yes it did need to be totally healed but it also needed to be changed.  Our emotions and feelings and perceptions are at the center of your mind, along with your thoughts and ideas.  Your memories and dreams are also within your mind, along with consciousness and concepts of how you exist.  What has been healed and what is being restored is your mind?  It involves so much it is making you tired to write and think about the magnitude of what has had to be done.  That is why it takes so long my Son.  The magnitude of healing billions and billions of thought patterns is a world where the evil one does not want you to get better.  The evil one did push you down in your weakened state but you are a fighter.  You held on to me.  That is what I wanted.  That was my will, that is God’s perfect will for you to do.  I have kept things very simply in your life so that you can heal and I can restore through manipulation all of the functions that you need to live in this world.  You are worthy of this, the things you agonize over as they have had to be left behind are the burdens that held you down before.  Lose the burdens from your life and bind the agonizing you do over them.  Good job Son.  You have turned from the world and its holds upon you and you will be complete.  We have written before the quiet healing time for you to be better is the most important time of all.  I have not released you to resume all of the things you did before.  Do not fear, do not worry, do not feel guilty, do not feel inadequate, do not feel left behind, you are chosen to be ahead not behind.  I will restore you when the time is just right.  The most troubling times of your healing have been here lately.   The time of harsh healing is truly now at an end.  You have endured so much pain in the mornings, the start up point of the day you don’t think you can stand it anymore.  You will endure and it will get so much better.  After the quiet time here, writing and existing with me has alone lifted you mood.  That is my plan my son.  The things around you in your life are a distraction to this our healing time.  That is all they are in fact and truth.  The things around you in your life at home are frustrating and stressful and unending and sickening and on and on.  Turn away fro now and accept my will!  It is not forever it is just for now, and the now for the time of healing is almost over anyway.

You can feel the calm here with me as I heal you but also the time of calm has been slowly increasing over the entire day for more than a month now.  It is a slow increase my child, I know you want it quicker and quicker but it must be gradual.  The intensity of the restoration of your mind is reduced now as we are over the tougher areas.  I will not again subject you to such suffering.  I want to say enjoy the time of healing to you but I know it has been a frustration in your experience.  You will look back upon it as I have told you through eyes that are more optimistic and joy filled.  You are still recovering my Son do give to yourself as I have instructed and do not take from yourself by being the least bit guilty – you are not!  Each day will improve – that I now vow to you, now more severe days – this I vow to you – no more attacks – the God inspired blockade is up.  Be calm my Love and look away from the world as much as you can, every opportunity, you will have more peace.  I am here to help you grow in a new way, a spirit way.  Rely on me not this world.  Time is short yes, but do not fear, I will hold my chosen near.

1-6-99

As you move through these times I am here with you to guide and hold you.  You are within my perfect will with obedience to me to complete what needs to be done and has to be done to make your life as your heart desires better and better.  Your actual feelings right now are tired, distractible, apathetic, negative, worried and fearful.  Now much more healing do you think needs to be done.  The way we can do this is “ worth it or not worth it”,  “guilty or not guilty”, “agonized or not agonized” That you felt wash harsh, it was, now my turn.  That is how difficult things can be,   I am softness and positiveness that takes over for you so that all positives can be brought out.  You will be healed of all of the negativity influenced thoughts that you have had very soon.  The mind as we have written is very complex.  You have given your mind over to me, completely to me, trusting me as you have with all of your thoughts and emotions.  I have been very careful with what I have been given.  I would never hurt you, I know what is best for you like any proud parent would.  You need some lifting up right now.  You are doing so much better my Son the truly harsh times are behind you.  You are thinking much more clearly than you did.  You may not feel that way yet with the distractions still in your mind, but all is working well with the healing.  Bind the negative feelings that you may have, they are fleeting thoughts from distraction in your mind.  If you hold any of them up to the light of truth they would fall apart as lies.  I will not let bad things happen to you while you are going through these times.  The negative thoughts that you have been plagued with are from the habit of thinking a particular way and from the enemy.  The evil one does this to my children by firing arrows of negative thoughts, attitudes and ideas into people over and over again until it becomes a habit to think negatively about most things.  I will heal the continued function of negative thinking but you can bind the thought process and loose the positive response to each think you think of first.  That is will done my Son.  This way the enemy attacks can be about depression and the sour feeling of life.   You are my chosen one.  Now way do I need to have my precious child have to suffer with negative thoughts any longer.  Through your dreams and through your waking times I will remove the continued emphasis on negative that has troubled you until now.  Understand my Son these levels of healing have been for a purpose, they are going deeper into you yes to really run you out but that is necessary for the call I have on your life.  You feel you are missing so much of life as this time goes on and on but it is a slow rebirth of life that is actually happening to you.  It has been about nine months now since the major healing has gone on about the time of a birth of a child. Good things take time my child.  I must have you feeling formed before I birth you back into the world.  I hear your thoughts of wanting to live again that you agonize over.  My child as I said earlier you are living, this is better than living because it is a set improvement of lift to receive a result better than before.  It is forcing you and others also to see the worth you have as a person to deserve to feel.  I have set you aside to do this, it is my WILL and I am covering all areas of your life that I can so you can do this.  The time line is as necessary as the healing.  It is forced rest in a different environment that teaches and heals to my chosen one.  Believe in me, they will wait, it will be rewarded, you will be the best rebuilt fulfilled Son.  I will guide your every step.

1-8-99

You are progressing to the goal of a mind, body, Soul and Spirit healed.  Gone will be the tormenting thoughts of unworthiness, comparison, envy and negativity.  My Son we did work very hard to remove those things from your thought process.  I had chosen you for what I knew you could become.  You have complied to me as I completely remold and remake you.  I am so pleased with what you have become.  You do not look at yourself as being changed because you are comparing the new person with the old surroundings.  You are new my Son.  You will see that more and more each day,  You are tired still my Son, that is because I still step up the healing to complete the things to do within the time I have told you.  I will keep my promise my Son, you will ‘feel better’.  The things to do yet with you are vast but do not fear, I am here with you and I hold you so close to me.  My precious child this has been the very best way we can communicate.  I have known how very difficult this would be to do and I have provided many things along your lumpy path to confirm and assist you.  Take my gentle care upon you and be at peace with me.  Your resting restores you.  The time will be worth it my Son.  It has not been a time of complete inactivity but different activity.  It will be a new life with a comfortableness that you will move into.  The energy will be there but not overdone as I did this week.  The distraction will be alleviated but not completely yet.  Hold on to me, give me the chance to rebuild you from the bottom up.  All the desires you have and have had I have kept track of.  I will give those to you.  I need your heart and Spirit, those eyes and that smile for my kingdom and for my children.  You are moving along to completeness in Christ.  Each day is better.  My plan.  I fulfill the realities of this world.  I am the Creator my Child, I create you anew with my love for you.

1-9-99

I know you are very unhappy.  I will heal you of the pain you are feeling and explain through this writing why you have been hurting.  You do not believe that I can change you and your moods from the way you are feeling to a happy man in these next few short days.  What if the miracle you had been waiting for was this feat of change for you?  Distraction and the frustration from it are plaguing you.  Confusion in your thoughts stop you from concentrating.  That is why we needed this emergency healing time here.  It was real, I put the thought into your mind and gave you the confirmation also.  I’m healing you now.  It is more conducive to heal you here.  I am also healing you through your many dreams.  They are difficult for you to bear but it will be worth it my son.  I hear every thought you have, do not fear relating them.  I understand and I am not subjecting you to anything that will not first help you or second take longer than is absolutely necessary.  I will change your moods.  They have been scraping the bottom of the barrel haven’t they?  I will change them to happy, carefree, passionate, loving, and energetic.  I will change your thoughts to positive.  They have had the cancer of negativity with them for long enough.  I will stop the ragged breath sighs.  That will again be your indicator.  I will level out your emotions as I lift them up.  They have been set by me at your lowest possible setting.  No my son, you could not have felt worse.  They were set there to stop you from rushing around.  You have learned every lesson I have put before you my innocent child.  I have manipulated you into trials and test which you have also succeeded in with victory.  You have passed the tests and trials while having part of your mind shut down.  It has felt that way I know, it will be turned back on again, that is my vow to you.  I sense that you are now feeling a little bit better, just a bit.  Please continue to be here with me now in our own little world of communication and I will oft you up more and more.  I am very sorry that this entire life changing, healing process to the Spirit filled life had to be so difficult for you my child.  I know the thoughts were tormenting and hurtful.  I will, I will, promise to restore you to your full capacity.  It was a great price for you to pay to be transformed but you are a pearl of great price and you will see it was worth it.  I hold you so close to my heart my beloved. 

All of the things that have been agonized about in your healing mind will be complete over a comfortable time frame my love.  You have endured more than most my love, you will also do more than most for my kingdom- our kingdom.  You have been victorious over the flesh and the world and time. I am both proud and pleased with you.  You are my chosen one.  I have set you apart for my use.  I have given you grace to rise above the darkened world you must live in for now.  I will continue to show you things that will bring you closer to me as you grow more and more in knowledge.  Yes the thought is from you but also influenced by me.  It is more clear to Heaven here.  It is the combination stress free, could free my child, do not concern yourself with this.  I cover all necessary communication in their appropriate ways.  I share some extra knowledge to you for the desires of your heart.  These times are for building up my son so he can face the part of the flesh world he must exist in.  It is not an easy call and I know you want to know it all right now but you must trust, abide in me, be guided by me and you will be free.  All those whom you envy will follow your path also to one degree or another.  Envy will be revealed as useless.  You will question why it was such a problem for you but then you will already know the truth of all things so the knowledge you seek will be with you.

You are doing all the things I have asked you to do.  There is no way you can stop the healing process now for yourself.  Do not fear, I will set up extra requirements or change the parameters of your life at this the last minutes of this time of your life.  I will not surprise you with things to do or say.  Spend as much time with me as you can and be in prayer to me as you have bee.  I will br right beside you for all of your needs.  I want to see you so much better you know.  I will not fake you out in any way.  Continue to write as we have.  It is my inspired word to you my son.  Heal and be happy.  My son came so you would have life and have it in abundance.  I will not break my word and my vows to you my love.   You have waited, you will have your reward.

1-10-99

You are so apprehensive my Son.  Bind it and your flesh to be free with me.  We will write of the things that will make you perceive things as light and truth.  This day was troubling for you because I am finishing what I need to do with your mind and perceptions to bring you into total health.  Believe in me and what I can do my Son.  I know your heart is believing along with your spirit but command your mind to claim it as you have done also.  I will not disappoint you.  The elusive feelings that I have kept from you will be revealed to you in a happier mood.  The way I have held you back will now be alleviated from you but in a careful way.  As I have promised you.  We grow on in our relationship carefully.   I learn much from you as we go through these times.  I am so happy you have chosen the life in the spirit with me.  I yearn for all of my children to come to me in the ways that we have established.  It will happen.

We are breaking down the barriers between the world and the Spirit all the time.  It brings me closer to you and you closer to me.  You are apprehensive about how you will fit into the world when these last days are drawing to a close.  Are you rushing things my Son?  Do you expect to be thrust back into the world with all of the responsibilities back upon you to hold you down and smother?  We will not do it that way.  All of the experiences that you will be regaining back in your life will be returning slowly to you.  Your mind is logical, it does not want to be overburdened.  Your soul is wanting to resume life as it was before so things can appear normal to those around you and your flesh will be accepted by the world.  I have called you to be separate from the world my Son.  Do not gratify the flesh with an accelerated jump back into life as you knew it fro your flesh’s sake.  That would disappoint you.  Accept rather my guidance for you and I will bring you to the things that you truly desire.  I have kept things going so slowly for you, you haven’t had many desires shown to you.  I have guided you very closely and very strongly for these past months.  You are also in fear that when you finally feel better you will not be able to control your flesh and you will leave my presence.  Again do you think I will leave you when you have come this far?  My Son I see your heart, it is the heart for your heavenly father.  Hold onto that.  I know you will not abandon me now it is time for you to know it also.  I will remove the scales of blindness from your heart eyes over the next days so you also will see the truth and light I have promised you.  These things will return gradually to you.  I will not pile them back on you all at once.  Why do a careful life changing healing and suffer all the concept changes and interior struggles not to mention the enemy trying to stop the whole process, only to overburden you again.  You know doctor the whole operation was a success but the patient died from trying to live too much too quickly?  You want to get back into life quickly and I say we must be more careful.  Your moods will change for the better.  The things that have harassed your mind for these last months will be gone.  As I have told you, you have learned the lessons of the Spirit well.   This has been a long, long time for you to be set apart for healing and for the restoration of you mind but as I Had also told you it had to be done.  I have changed you around very radically so that you would see the light and truth that most do not see.  I have not led you on in any areas my Son.  I have shared with you truths of your calling as facts not as enticements to bring you along.  Your anointing is very vast and you can do things in the Spirit realm that most others can not do.  You know how to do things in the Spirit realm that most don’t know how to do.  Bind the feelings of loneliness from your calling.  Good job Son.   As you feel the feelings of peace and quietness over you, you are put at ease that I am with you closely watching you.  I have shared so much of what I have been doing to heal you, you also feel confused about what to feel when to feel it.  I am watching you and guiding you.  I am guiding others around my special Son also.  I am guiding situations in your life to assure your comfort.  All these things are true.  Do I as your God, your Heavenly Father lie?  No, I never do.  Do I exaggerate what I am doing?  No, I do not need to do that either.  Ask again for your faith to be increased my Son.  Believe that we are moving along this road carefully expanding our communication, our relationship, and reforming you in a new way.  This is a new thing I do today with you.  I have brought others to me in radical ways but you need to know you are special.  You are special my Son, you have endured a lot of things that have made you stronger.  Now you will have the reward for enduring and holding on.  These harsh times are now going to be over and gently we will rebuild you in ways that will delight you.  I will restore you.  I will work to restore all that has been lost in time and all that was lost from the enemy you will regain many fold.  My vow to you my Son is for happiness and completeness, for a Spirit inspired life with me that will draw others from you.  I love you child.  By my guided hand you will grow to grace and completeness.  I value you so much.

1-12-99

As you re-read what we store yesterday you have the thoughts of how positive and reinforcing it is.  I do direct you in that way my sweet Son.  I want all that I share with you to be for building you up as much as possible.  Things in your mind have been plagued by negativity or not building up, that was a very depressed way to view things.  Now today as I have already arranged for you notice the slight upward lift in your feelings and mood.   You are more calm.  You are more at peace.  You are more accepting of what is going on around you.  Abide in me and those feelings will grow.  You are noticing some things slowly, that is my plan.  I insist you re-enter your perceptions and thought processes slowly.  I will not have my special Son overburdened.  The time will continue to show you how wonderful you are.  Do not fear anything that you do or feel, I an guiding you closely with my hand as I do the powerful God work in you with healing we have written about.  You my Son are of great worth, you are of great worth to me as I will bring people to you that need your touch and your heart.  You are worth the love you have arrived looking at from others around you.   You did not look at it because you were told you were unworthy – that is a lie!  Bind that memory now my child it is now to be banished from your life.  Good job worthy Son.  You have been through a tremendous battle for freedom of bondages and teaching you the ways of light and truth.  I love your individual ways my Son.  All that you are I love about you.  I have held you in my arms – you remember.  I know just who you are and I love exactly that. My Son.

1-13-99

The cleansing and refilling is being done to you as you rest here with me.  The cleansing is from unnoticed spirits trying to oppress you.  They are gone.  I will not have you do more than you are capable of.  You did very well at the lessons you have learned.  The refilling of the Holy Spirit you felt was real.  Is the feeling acceptable to you my Son?  The tingles you feel and see are my grace and anointing around you.  I just want you to be filled again and again.  I am working to restore your feelings and moods to you within the time frame established.  I am with you each step of the way.  I will not leave you.  Do not fear the fleeting memories you are having in your mind, they are part of my plan of rebuilding you and your life.  You are also having feelings come and go you do not understand.  My child lay your cares down at my feet and come into my arms to rest.  You need to be here so that I can reinforce my child that he is being cared for.  Do not worry about what way the future will be for you.  I see all the styles, you will not loose.  I see all the desire of your heart; I will give them to you.  I also see the pains of your heart.  I am removing those from you as they are brought to the light of your mind, Son this has bee an ongoing process of changing your mind with all of the process of changing your mind with all of the processes involved and functions involved.  I do not want you to do it yourself, you can not.  You must give the battle to me and be willing to leave it at my feet.  I will not disappoint you.  Your life will not disappoint you.  You are doing exactly what you need to do according to my will that will bring you to freedom and peace in your life and times.  You are comparing yourself with others again; you must bind these feelings when you can.  Good job my Son.  Be with me, this world does not have a clue what we are doing or the huge magnitudes I am going through to build you back up.  You/we just answered another question your mind tried to trip you up on … Could this be a deception?  Well I am for building up and you will be built up and you needed saving and I am saving you so I am good, I am God, I sent my Son your savior for you to be free.  Now bind the doubt you have and rest in my arms.  Do not be concerned with the distraction in your mind, I am healing that more slowly but it will be healed.  I know your thoughts are random and they will be brought together more tightly.  Allow the things you crave and the feelings you desire to come to you.  You cannot do this type of healing yourself.  You need your heavenly Father to take over for you and care for you.  You were broken before my Love but you are being rebuilt fully from the remnant that was you into a new being.  All things will be done with me with you my Son.  I will not torture you with things to do and take your energy to do them and have you face this forever.  This was for a time to rebuild you; this was for a person to be saved.  You are.  These things that harass you will be done effortlessly when you are better.  My vow my promise.  You will be happy.

1-14-99

All is well my Son.  When you say it over and over in your mind you can believe it, even one such as you that is going through such a healing process.  You are safe here with me and I am taking advantage of this precious time to heal you of things you need to be healed am purged from.  You have done nothing wrong to be outside of my will with you.  I am most pleased with you to be with me.  All of my children could look to me and be with their God like you are doing now.   It is so good for you to do this.   You have had the opportunity to tell others about this time and you share the information that you know with them.  That is what I want you to teach to my children.  The personal relationship with God.  You are learning it, we are developing it.  Many others do talk with me through prayer but you know about reaching out to me, when you need me to rescue you.  That is what a ministry is all about my Son.  To know the Father is a call upon your life for you to begin to entertain.  For now I call you to still look away from the world.  You will be feeling better and better and little bit better each day.  I have written of this to you but where were your expectations?  My Son the mind and soul did play around with you and you expected to be healed right away to such a level that you and I could not achieve it.  You are getting better and better each day, I am working with you for that.  It will still take time, that disappoints you because you wanted to resume normal life as you had known it before Son, if your life were never as before but it was still as wonderful as it was would you ever be content?  I know your heart and know you will be happy with what I have planned for you.  Try not to be discouraged with what has been done.

1-18-99

It is with frustration that you write with me today.  I am sorry you are so taken in by this time for healing and restoration.  You have not enjoyed the reflective time over these months as I had hoped you could learn how to do.  I have the responsibility for the things that are happening in your life.  Bind your presumed responsibility and give the entire situation to me.  I do not want you to have to carry that extra burden.  Your flesh and soul still want to take over for the pain so that you can fix it but you can not fix all of these things.  I am fixing them in their order of importance.  You are the most important thing to be fixed.  Your mornings are hard because you are coming from the dream state to the waking state.  I had told you I was using your dreams to heal you.  There is healing that hurts in your dreams, I want that time to not have to be felt by you with the pain involved.   Your scattered thoughts are from that, adjusting to what had been healed during sleep.  I will not allow attacks on your sleep during this healing time, accept the feelings as slow progressive healing and you will be more relaxed.  What I have written to you is the truth in that you were so worried about the mornings and you didn’t understand what was happening. I vow to you that the painful mornings will be over soon.  I cannot heal much more of you, do you not think that?  I will restore your energy and ambition soon also.  The time is behind us for the major work. You will be both happy and successful as your heart wishes.  All within my will my son with my guidance.  You have excelled in want for a restored life.  Be ashamed about nothing your responsibility is with me.

1-20-99

It is a good day for a healing my Sn, now relax and understand that is  you and these exact words that I want to write with you that are my will.  You give me your will each day so that I may work my will in your life.  You understand the concept so well as I directed my servants to teach you of it as you teach others the things I wanted you to see clearly.  You are not randomly watching the world go by my Son, I am directing you, guiding you in many of the things that you I do. More than you realize.  I need to do this with you so you will improve day by day and your faith will grow day by day.  It is hard for you to believe that I am directing so many things and that all of these “spirit things” are true and real in this life.  Bind the disbelief my Son and you will be more at peace to be with me and believe in me.  You do not feel worthy of my attention to you, you still do not believe you are valuable to me in what underlies the doubt.  First know this there are things I am doing each day in fact each hour of each day that are healing your broken spirit and burned out soul.  I am restoring your mind from the ravages of medication problems – this is a time consuming process.  I need to change neurons and all of the chemical balances in your mind.  I have done this slowly yes but carefully and completely in you.  You look at the time that these problems have been dealt with as equivalent to a lifetime of out of order.  To your perceptions it may feel that way not but compared to what your life will be it is only a season.  I will have you back into the life you have enjoyed so much at times in the fullness of all you have hoped for.  I also know you are a person who wants to fit in with others.  You would never know you are going through such pain my Son.  To look at you as others do I have kept you secret within the fold of my robe.  They do not notice the pain you feel. You are walking out the steps of this life looking and acting Christ like.  Many envy you my Son.  Do you believe that?  I speak truth whenever I speak so your conclusion is they do envy me.  What for?  The anointing on your life and the power it brings that I have bestowed upon you.  Your ability to do this healing and ministry work you do for me evokes a freedom that few have.  Your looks and your style are seen by many and are envied by many many people.   You see my Son others cannot have the things you have just as you cannot have theirs.  I make it all the same my Son, vow that to you.  I am the equalizer child, your reward will be forthcoming and will be plentiful for you.  You have done a wonderful job looking away from the world and what others have.  It still can get to you especially when the enemy tries to get at you but you are improving wonderfully and it will not be long now when you will be as I told you ten times better in mood and thought and deed.  You are so troubled by the deeds you need to do.  I know and see all my child – you do not “need
 to do all of those things.  I want you to want to do them.  That is why I took all of your old wants out of you.  So that you could develop slowly a new want system.  As I have written to you, you are not missing anything in life that is of any consequence.  The life you will have will be much more full and complete.  My Son will not do any good to have you move back out into life without being fully healed.  I will write directly to you now.  I must hold you back from stepping out because you are not strong enough to endure the world and the stresses put upon people.  I will protect you from yourself if that is what it takes.  The time is imperative for you to be restored to what level I know you need to exist in the life I have planned for you.  You are special, you are directed by me.  It will not do you any good to step out in the world only to be driven back by the stresses.  You would then need at least twice as long then to rebuild again.  I do not want that.  I want you to rest in me, do the ministry work I have called you to do, and learn from me as you have been.  Do not feel guilty or responsible for the things you perceive, you are to be free with me Son. I value this time with you, even when you do not feel me as close.  You and your flesh do not like this times frame to heal, you do not like it very much.  You in fact have so many emotions within yourself swirling around  I need to be close by you to direct them.  You do not go from life threatening problems to restored Son without some problems.  Put all of the anger at me for doing this and all the responsibilities presumed overlooked and all the unfair life lost situations together in your mid and bind them and give them to me.  That was a lot wasn’t it my Son?  Those feelings and emotions that confuse and distract from the truth are not to get so overwhelming in your body.  I want them from you. They are caustic and will erode your Spirit.  These types of healing and giving over to me are a wonderful way for us to get to know each other better.  I will not have you hurting when I can help you but

you must be willing to lay it down at my feet so I can then take it from you.  Very important, release and then I can take.  I see anger from hurts inside of you still my son, be aware of how far you have come but that you still need to be free of this green bile junk.  It confuses your thought and slows the progress to have you free.  Your thoughts will not be confused anymore when we finish this last area.  Bind the feelings and give them to me.  I will take them and remove them from your sight.  Do not fear, I see your heart and it was saddened but you are growing to be free and happy.  All will be restored to you, I vow.  Give your cares to me totally.  Do not attempt to understand why I do these things to you.  Have faith and increase the faith with the Holy Spirit.  Not a day longer than what is absolutely necessary.  I see your pain and frustration.  I am sorry son but this has to be done you will be healed and full of life you will enjoy all family and love so your wife.  My vow to you upon this day the rest is needed I will guide your way.

1-21-99

Be at peace with me.  I will call you my special Son by that phrase.  You have been healing land learning and working within my will for quite a time now.  I am so pleases with what you have done. I do heal you but I also then move you from glory to glory. The evil one wants to stop you but he has failed – you have won – with my help yes but you have won over the evil one, the enemy, the one called satan.  You are healed in the supernatural realm truly but it is now manifesting in the world realm to you.  You have victory over the flesh and the world and the one who tried to come against you.  You will also have the glory level moved up for you to experience in your life.  This has been one of the larger levels to move through in this world my Son.  The enemy can not take this away from you.  You will now be happier and more in control of your life from your strength you found in me.  I will now bless you more with my guidance and my voice in your life you have prayed for.  You are becoming more confident with yourself as I see you in this life.  I will add the memories back into you as you feel more and more happy and strong.  I still caution you to move slowly, this will still take time to acclimate you back into life here as my will leads.  I care too deeply for you my beloved to have you move too fast.  Rock solid, and I Love you So.

1-23-99

Yes you are being healed right now my child.  I hear all of your prayers that you send to me, the prayers from your heart are not held back by anything in the world or the supernatural realm.  You have suffered greatly my Son in this earth realm. I have called you because I knew how much you could bare by the size of you heart.  Your heart to want to please me is very large.  I will not take advantage of it but I have pushed you long and hard.  The suffering with your emotions and thought struggles will be over soon.  You will be energetic and happy.  Hold on to me and pursue calmness.  I will hold back the very stressful things in your life.  I am slowly bringing you back into a life you will be comfortable in but I do do it slowly.  Try not to look to others’ lives with that old comparison and envy as you have in the past.  I know you are doing much better in this area but believe me they would want what you have with me so much.  I as so happy we are growing our relationship closer and closer my Son.  Do not doubt that we are moving closer each day and do not doubt that you are getting better each day.  It may be a small amount but you will build each day until you are so much better.  Just be most of the time my Son.  I will share that with you today.  Many people I call to be doing something here or there I have not led you into anything to be doing have I?  except your ministry work and learning from me right? Now I want you to just ‘be’ and not feel guilt about it.  I do not want you to feel bad because you are resting, that is my will for you, rest with me.  Be calm with me and I quietly rebuild you my Son.  That is my will for you.

1-29-99

I am here with you to strengthen and heal you as we move along in this life.  Do not fear or doubt that I am real, more real in fact than this life itself.  I need you here for focus, focus upon you and what we need to do.  Turn away from the world now and bind additional thoughts of discouragement and I will remove them and set you free.  I can feel how you are feeling – you submit yourself so much to me – I will be diligent about fulfilling my promise to you about coming here and I will speak through you and heal you to a great extent. Have patience my child, I will fulfill my vow to you.  I will fulfill all of my promises to you.  I see the situations and the outcomes of all the things that you worry about.  I will tell you ways to avoid the negative outcome situations.  The things I do not tell you about are the ones that ill resolve themselves.  The worry as you have counseled to others is useless.  Bind the worry you feel about the things I your life.  It is a habit that will bring out anxiety and lead to fear for your thought process.  I will take it when is bound and given to me my Son.  I do not want you burdened with those feelings.  I am holding you back from doing the things that you have perceived would bring you happiness.  You would not be happy when they were done my child.  You could have had a reaction of despair to the things you tried to accomplish.  I do not want that, it is easier to have you rest than to have you anymore at all disappointed by life.  Life did disappoint you in a life threatening way, that is why I have take much of life away from you, it needs to be reintroduced to you when you are healed slowly and surely.  I will not rush life back into you.  Life is special and you my Son are special.  In order for life to be again a living experience for you it must be carefully repaired.  I am careful with you because you are such a special person. Believe me those that really know you are amazed by the heart of Jesus you have.  Do not fear now my Son.  I will rebuild you carefully and completely.  It may feel darkened and bleak for now but it will continue to get better and better until you are acclimated into the life I have planned for you.  You are doing absolutely nothing wrong in you living that would have me displeased with you at all.  In fact the evil one cannot get at you through sin and lawlessness hardly at all.  I hold his ground for you.  You are not happy at some of these times of healing.  Note I said “some of these times. My Son you are less unhappy now than you were three months ago.  Do not fear your feelings and prayers to me stating “I am unhappy Father”.  I need to be aware of your feelings all of the time.  Tell me all the more of how you are feeling and I will send my grace down upon you to lift you up.  The time here with only these few distractions is wonderful for us.  I do not want to pressure you into this too much but it is for the healing that I call you here.  He leadeth me beside the still waters my word states.  I need to lead you here, sometimes prod you here, sometimes manipulate you here to help and hold you.  Just you and I, for I am a jealous God.  I want no distraction form our time.  Do not fear the many thought you have when you feel you cannot concentrate.  I tell you the truth those many thoughts were from your very intelligent mind doing all the deductive reasoning you were so capable of.  That shows you that your mind is vast.  It is vast, I am saving that aspect for you.  I will not take anything from you for good.  I will take it from you for a time for your own good, while you are being healed.  You see now through our writing that your most important issues are being addressed here by me, in order of importance.  Do not feel that your life will never be fulfilling my Son.  I will restore you to the completeness you crave.  This healing saved your life my child; you were so close to the end as the enemy had the rule over you for a time.  I am sorry it had to be so severe on you.  You are still reeling and healing from the things one and two years ago.

I am so glad you give me the free rein in your life so that I can relay the things, all the things I want to you when we are here.  Hold to this situation and closeness my Son.  I tell you the truth it is a blessing I have bestowed upon you because of the walk you have had and are having, I know all and see all, I knew you would be right here needing me today and so I was ready to bless you. It is hard to do what you are doing here, to be set apart so radically by me to uphold you and heal you and teach you about me.  My angels are here with us as we communicate.  You will be restored, you will be happy in your life, all the things that have needed to be done will be resolved with almost effortless energy.  I have watched all of the things in your life as they have unfolded, I hear the desires of your heart.  I know the outcomes of life here on earth. I will direct you exactly on what the best path will be.  Fear not!  I am so close to you to direct you in the way in which you need to go.  Wait on me and just be as I have written to you in the past.  You will have to wait on me for the resolve of some of the things that had troubled you.  The waiting time is difficult for you because you do not value yourself and your health enough yet.  I have told you to give to yourself and yet this little guy of mine would rather beat himself up rather than accept my responsibility and rest.  It may seem like a very long long time to rest yes but you are a very very important soul to me.  I have  made you take the time by removing things from you that will make you not want to do things yet.  I have done this you know and feel all too well.  If you feel tired and want to rest you must do it.  Your mind will try to tell you you have slept enough and eaten enough and you are not sick so you should be doing things, that my Son is the flesh talking. I have called you to be in the Spirit with me away from the world and the flesh for now, for a time.  It will end, you will be healed, you will be put back somewhat into the world to enjoy life s you well deserve to.  My vow to you.

2-1-99

You are a true light in this darkened world my Son.  This day as may others is difficult for you again. I am sorry it had had to be so difficult for you to be pushed into this non conventional area of living you have had to endure.  You are fearful of the things that I want to write with you about because of blocked feelings you have with me.  Stay with me in these endeavors today and I promise you freedom with grace.  Bind the thoughts of unbelief and doubt.  It is done my Son.

The healing that is being completed in your mind is not from your involvement.  You were attacked by pure black evil one year and tow and two and one half years ago.  You have carried the evidence of these attacks with you and the burden of pain upon your spirit.  I am coming through your life like a white bulldozer from the past to the present to cleanse you from what has been set against you.  This time of healing again has been harsh for you, more than you thought would have been necessary to relieve your mind.  The confusion you have felt is the enemy and the assistants that are working for him casting and incantating against you.  Your wonderful heart cannot even conceive that people would go to overt and covert means to harm you in this world realm much less in the spiritual realm.  They have done this over and over again to destroy you because of what they knew you could be and would be in your life.  You are already victorious over the incantations and spells because you are still here with me writing now.  They have made your life quite intolerable up until now with all the tricks they have done.  Son they are black of heart, devoid of soul and we can come against them now.  It was the fragmentation of your mind and the destruction of you emotions that they were after.  They did cause you to suffer with their continual sliming of you.  Break the bands from yourself now and you will be free.  Be not afraid of judgment or retaliation upon you.  I your Lord know the needs to be done and I will guide you through it.  It is my will that you become strong and secure now.  My Son I told you you were big in the kingdom of God and you are.  The oppression you have endured will make you stronger than you can yet imagine.  You have been faithful to me and my calling upon your life.  Do not be afraid to even think of all we have accomplished today.  I will honor all of the prayers for breaking powers you have related to me – everyone.  I have known of these curses upon you for a time yes and I needed to bring you to this self-deliverance stage of your healing because I knew what you needed to feel better.  It is now cleared out from around you.  The messages have been delivered as I promised.  You will feel the lightning of your spirit as you develop into life s you need to.  You are going through this trial for the purpose of the kingdom and it will cause blessings to be bestowed upon you now and blessings to be continued upon you for your now covered and protected removal of world wench influences upon you.

This was a hard day thing to do my Son but you are the victorious one with Christ Jesus with you.  I will restore you now with the blessings I have promised to you.  Your strongholds are broken you are free.

2-6-99

You are better off than you are aware of right now.  You are feeling negative about the effects of my call upon your life.  You glow like a 1000 watt bulb in the darkened world.  The strength you need to develop will be formidable to anyone or thing ever encountered in your life again.  Not promises that are fake, not pride or better than others syndrome do you have.  My will and my words to you.  They are a vow and a covenant to you personally of prophesy.  The statements are true and simple.  The need you have to get strength – this is the time consuming part of this frustrating healing.  I will not hold back words from you.  Words about your home, the oppression, the inner healing, the future, the other, let’s put some of these things to rest for good new Son.  I feel the pain in your spirit and soul.  I want it gone now this afternoon. Energy, desire, promises, fulfillment, weight, trials, tests.  I am guiding you on just what to do.  I will draw closer to you as you draw closer tome.  Draw a line through each of the issues we address.  I will remember, you will be reinforced.  There is move for you to truly compare yourself to from around your world.  I favor your growth because I know of the pain you have endured for me. You have gone through such emotional trials you have not had much rest from my trials of you.  The time is short and you are tough, I do not mind the complaining, it is valid my little one it does hurt to go through a powerful healing.  The healing as you are both unique and wonderful.  You are full of spiritual and soulish wounds from your early life and from the horrible attacks upon your body, soul, and spirit.  I am restoring you to fullness my Son yes but with the fullness also comes the grace and the discernment you will need to be as strong as you need to be.  I have been guiding you for years even though there have been times of pain in your growth I have adjusted them to be just what you needed and could bare.  The flesh that you have my beloved is very strong, I do mean very strong.  You know when you try to kill it and crucify it that flesh does not go away easily. Your soul is also very strong; it holds your will and mind.  Your emotions and your mind have been hurt my Son.  The hurts on your emotions and your mind are being healed but are still susceptible to pain for you and I am moving to stop that for you.  Your mind and emotions are wonderfully made yes until they are damaged, then if proper repairs are made they can heal even when they are so complex.  Your mind and emotions were so badly damaged you needed time to heal but I needed a lot of time to heal you.  My Son as I have told you your emotions are very complex and your mind is vastly large in the amount of thoughts and ideas it produces.  I needed and still need time to bring it all back together.  I do promise you that I will be done now very soon but let yourself off the flesh hook of being responsible for all the time this has taken.  I have reworked many protective shields into your mind and thought process to protect you in your future with me.  I have rearranged your thoughts into a concise pattern that matches Jesus’ thoughts.  That my Son is the mind of Christ that my word states you are to pursue.  You are receiving the renewed mind of Christ in a more full way through the painful sacrifices you have had to make and endure through.  The enemy has harassed you in creative ways that have kept even me jumping to your defense. You my Son are living a pure Christian life in a mud black world.  The vision of the clouds I have given you and the layers and nets that are cast to stop me from hearing my precious children do deter me at times.  The enemy really wants you dead, you are a direct threat to him and all the vile things connected with him.  Your knowledge grows each day!  I am sorry I have to leave you here on earth in the muck but each battle you have waged has brought you higher to me and I have increased your power.  Each battle you have won has brought you knowledge and experience that will help you to overcome evil.    I will use you mightily in the kingdom my child. I knew you when I called you.  I knew you before you were born.  I knew what you would be and what you would do.  I know you will be healed and happy, as happy as you were at the very least.  That was my promise of inheritance to you.  That time of completions is now at hand my beloved.  You have excelled in knowledge and understanding and obedience to me also my child I am so proud of your endurance and spirit my Son.  The spirit I removed from you for a time to restore I have returned to you now.  The precious spirit that you possess is stronger than you will ever need but I tell you that for your security to know.  The feelings you had of me actually coming into your body were real.  It was long before I told you of healing your spirit I took your spirit to heaven with me to carefully and lovingly rebuild it for you.  I left you somewhat spiritless for a time but m Holy Spirit was within you for all the protection you would need.  Others would look upon this act as unbelievable but you know the feelings you had.  I chose now to tell you of this because it was Father’s time to tell you and show you through visions what I have done.  Your spirit of life is with you now, stronger than anyone could imagine and healed fully.  You will understand more of this later my child but for now that is what I warned you of that the enemy will try to split body soul and spirit from a person.   They can then be lost to me.  I heal the enemy will steal.

The things that you have listed in the beginning of this writing all have to do with your frustration and your flesh.  Bind them both my Son.  The level I am bringing you to with me of power and anointing will be ominous.  It has taken tests and trials and time from your life but I see your heart.  You have the heart for the Lord; you have the heart of the Lord.  You have my heart watching over you as closely as I can for I love you so.  I will never leave you my child my beloved.  I had to push you to the limits of your endurance so that I could test your gold.  You are more valuable than gold to me my love but the example must show.  I will test you more in your life my Son but for now I will not and I will hold back the evil one from you for a time so that you will then restore some of the desires of your heart I have heard.  I always intended to restore the things to you but I had to be so careful with you. You were so frail as I told you.  You still are frail somewhat Son, do not fear I will guide you into the things to do.  It will seem effortless but go slowly my Son.  It is hard to get go of one that has been hurt so much.  Your walk with me will inspire others that seek me.  I am real and I want more of my children so that we may commune love and relationship as we have my Son.  There is more of me that you want and more of you that I want as we exchange our thoughts and spirits.  That is my plan child, you are fulfilling my plan in a new way.  I will bring others to you that will need this.  Your love will guide them to me and your experience will stop the enemy from influencing my children.  You are through the harshest battles with your healing and with the enemy.  Your love has won the battles over your flesh with your strong heart and your mind has been victorious over the enemy. You have won-. I will continue my promise to you of restoration.  I will now refill my sweet child with the essences of life that I removed from you for a time.  Believe in me more my Son.  I will continue to show you the secrets of heaven and the secrets of my creation here on earth.  Your adventure of life that you are beginning to live will amaze you.  Let me be your pilot.

2-9-99

I am sorry that you have been subjected to so much harsh oppression for the last two days.  The evil one had made a plan to trap you by his (no gender) knowing what you would do.  The enemy knew your heart would go out to want to pray for the pastor and so he turned up the misery for the pastor Sunday so that you would respond with caring.  The spirit of depression was huge and hidden as it put its claws into you so deep and the sides of it up to eight made it stronger yet.  I knew you were reading about hidden powerful spirits and I am still guiding you to know how to remove all of these things.  The fatigue you then felt from having removed all of that junk made you susceptible to the larger spirit of destruction last night.  That spirit is dimensional and sided so remember to pray dimensions away when you bind a spirit.  I will now heal and bless you and what you do today and throughout the next month.  You can make up your request list of twelve things for me to bless you with my Son.  I want you to be happy and I know you have been hurt.  Again I am sorry for the pain of this world.  The evil one is just that – evil, when things start stepping up and more evil is manifested people will look to you for help.  I have trained you harsh and hard, you are paying your dues.  I will never allow more than you can bare but I have pushed you far enough.  I will cloak you from now until you are through many happy times.  That means no enemy attack against you.   Pray every day for deliverance and be prudent in what you do, I will stop the evil one now from his plans of destruction upon you have endured enough.  You need peace and some, I said some productivity for your happiness. I am a very jealous God and I want you for me.  I control all that happens in the world my Son but the enemy is here in the world with you, my creation, my achievement, my children. I will stop the evil one with such a force as my word states.  You are at the forefront of this battle my Son.  I have called you to walk with me and you have not let me down.  I have

pushed you to your maximum endurance as you are feeling now.  Do not compare yourself to others around you.  Your walk and your anointing is very vast and I will uphold my promises to you.  You will lead my Son not follow.  God disposes power on some that will confound the others.  Rely upon that.

The building back up of you has been a difficult road for you to endure and for me to keep my promises.  The gentle nudgings you feel are me putting just a couple of fleeting happy thoughts back into your mind.  I am very careful with your memories because they have changed.  I have changed some of the things you like.  I have taken over some of your life my Son, believe in me that it is to bring you health and happiness.  I need to control some of your will for a time as we move through this life.  My promises to you will be fulfilled for you when you believe in me.  I will build you up again with strength and joy.  I will build your life back up with happiness and fullness.  I will build your emotions back up with stability and calmness.  I will put in all the “right stuff”.  You will be blessed, I will guide. patience

2-10-99

I need to build you up in the area of calmness my child.  The enemy has come against you in this area because you have ‘had’ a predisposition to worry and to be nervous and to be anxious.  The habits of these feelings are difficult to break, especially when the enemy has a vast storehouse of arrows to shoot into you with the attributes of worry nervousness and anxiety on them.  The way to destroy these peace robbing feelings is with calmness.  It may need my help to help restore peace but it is what I want for you.

Turn away the cares of the world and the flesh.  The flesh is where the feelings come from, the fear is the underlying feeling.  Bind the fear and worry will go.  Fear is an overdone emotion.  You have many unfounded fears that we will deal with mores as time goes on.  I will guide you and provide you with me voice.  I will direct your paths and soothe you when you hurt.  I will keep you calm when the others around you cannot find calm.  I tell you again the truth I am real and I am with you land I called you to be with me.  I am very happy with what you have done and are doing.  You feel lost and unworthy of the attention I give to you, to the point of not even believing this is real at times.  I hear your doubt, I know of your faith level.  I chuckle lovingly at you my child, I know what happens and I know you will be with me and you will be happy and healed.  This time set totally apart from others has your flesh screaming for re entry into the world but your Spirit has said no I am staying with my Father and his calling to me because I know I need the healing and restoration in my body, soul and spirit.  That my Son makes me very happy.  You are listening to my Spirit and to your Spirit.  Yes my yoke is easy, especially when you were so badly broken by the world.  You are dealing in and with an almost entirely flesh reactive world.  I want my child to be protected, rested, totally restored and calmed so that he may walk as Jesus did, as a man of God and as the Prince of Peace.  Call upon Jesus for the peace you seek my Son.  It is my plan for you to move slowly and carefully in this flesh world.  The enemy kills with speed – speed creates the fear rush and then it becomes habitual to go fast and worry and create an anxiety stronghold.  It will go against the grain of the world to go slow and your flesh will cry out to be like the world going faster but try to functions slowly. Go slowly in your steps with me, go slowly in your thinking – remember I guide the time.  I will not let you miss things in life.  Do not let the slow way become a frustration to you my Son.  Bind the flesh wanting to rush ahead and loose the peace of the Lord.

The confusing sadness you are feeling is not a pattern starting to establish itself like depression, it is me removing the old pattern of depression from you.  Do not fear I am removing it carefully and yes slowly so that it will be completely done.  I am watching all things of significance in your life to keep all aspects safe.  I will not let you down.  You will be restored and happy and you will be free of all depression.

2-12-99

I know you are troubled by the things of the world but you must bind the sorry and even the very thoughts that give you trouble.  I am guiding you through each thing you encounter even when it feels like I am not there with you.  I am.  The amount of things you have done this week is significantly greater than what you have done before this.  I am allowing things back into your thought patterns at a little faster rate.  That is already at times boggling to your mind but you are enduring very well.  They are not.  I repeat not random tings happening to you my Son.   I have directed each one to fit into your life from months ago.  I am guiding all I had promised to you.  I will not let the things of the world over burden you.  That was at the center of what plagued you before.  They need to be reintroduced to you slowly – I say again slowly.  You do not want things to go that way in the flesh do you?  I tell you the truth my child I will call the shots upon how quickly you will be acclimated back into the life I have planned for you.

When the world seems like it is slipping away with all of the craziness remember I will hold you into me and keep you safe and calm.  You will seek me even when you are strong and bold and I will hold you and keep you and your loved ones.  My Son I will not let you fall into the traps of the world again.  I know it is hard to feel strong now but remember your strength is with Jesus in you.  His strength no one can argue with.  It is a gentle power that consumes the enemy. It is a power that you have and use each day and so you see you know Jesus a lot more than you feel you do.  He gave you the song he walks with me and he talks with me so very long ago.  Your are practicing peace with power my Son and the power has to be built up.  No you do not feel like any building up has been done and it has taken such a long time.  I watch from above and from within my beloved I see the progress that I will for you to make.  You are doing perfectly for me, and perfectly for you.  My grace is upon you now my beloved.  You feel the weight of my healing hand now don’t you?  I am here to comfort you with the silence of the spirit child.  It is my will and my design to heal and calm you here with me.

All of the things and I do mean all the things that are giving you torment in and around you home will be resolved soon my Son.  I will not cause you pain or discomfort with them.  How could I?  You have come into the Spirit so quickly and you have fought off all of the advances of the enemy so diligently my Son.  I cannot burden you with more problems, follow my leading and you will have effortless resolution to these.  The mornings as you have felt are a very difficult transition time prone to the enemy

advancing boundaries upon you.  I will hold him back and lessen the pain for you.  Seek my rest my son, I will guide you.  It will soon now improve to happiness.  I am watching each day, each thought each prayer.  I will bless.

2-13-99

Guided by the Spirit of God my Son, that is just the way I want you to be.  I am very close to you and it is a blessing when you feel me this close.  I will bless you with the requests you have written out for me.  I will keep the evil one and the horrendous spirits that had afflicted your way from you now until you are fully healed and restored.  I am directing your paths along this life as I have been sharing with you.  I am protecting all of the things that affect you.   All will be as you wish very soon now in your life.  You are impatient with me in that you blame yourself for these healing and redirecting times but you must remember is  I who is taking responsibility for the times and situations.  You are not responsible for these times, I am softening those around you who would have an effect upon you.  Be at peace my Son.  Pursue peace as often as possible my Son to make you heal faster.  Give it to me my Son and crucify the flesh.  The mornings and the change from dream state to waking is a painful time for you.  I am directing your dreams and healing you through them.  I am moving fast to deliver you from the feelings you had in your life to new feelings and blessings in your new life.  Imagine large my Son.  I am listening so carefully to your thoughts.  I will restore you and all you touch to your hearts desire.  Be with me but let me work in your life.  The progress is there slowly your will emerge totally victorious.

2-15-99

Just writing a few words or lines can open up the flow of me to you hurting Son.  There are many things that your perceptions are having a difficult time dealing with but I will help you through each one until you are feeling better.  First cast off your self denigrating attitude.  You are worthy to be here and worthy of my time with you and worthy of prophetic writing.  I have stopped the enemy influence upon you and pushed the boundaries back to where they need to be to protect you from harm.  The enemy will not get at you while you are healing again. 

I have been reintroducing memories into your mind at a stepped up rate to finish the healing in record time.  That is making you very unhappy.  I will stop it now.  I will readjust the problem of what I want you to absorb right away.  I did not intend to reconstruct you this way. All of the sad feelings will go and I will add extra happy thoughts to you right now that will stay with you.

2-19-99

You will go on my Son.  If you choose to go on without berating yourself it will be better for you.  I do not want you to feel bad about the life you are walking now fear and discouragement can affect you.  Continue to bind the bad feelings that you have and give them to me.  Loose the feelings you want in your life and will fulfill them as I can.  I am relaying the truth to you that each day you are getting better and better.  Today you feel the healing now and the lifting of your spirit for being here with me today.  Draw close to me and take your own advice of time spent with me doing whatever.  I called you to be apart and you have been just that with me and I have healed your many thoughts and memories at the same time.  I leave no stone unturned my Son that is why it is so painful for you to be on this continuing walk with me.  I will purify you my Son.  I will cleanse you out in so many ways as I have been doing.  Have faith and build your faith in prayer as you have done.  I will fulfill all of my promises of restoration to you and to your home and life.  You still need to go slow and learn how to go more slowly.   The fundamental thoughts in your life were speeded up and racing ahead with medicine adding to the problem.  I have to take away in order to slow down and then rebuild.  I am here always holding you.  My Son so worn out so early, I will give you rest to heal you and restore what was lost.  I love you my Son; I am your creator and I see all.  I love what I see.

2-22-99

You my Son are being fed and led by my Holy Spirit today.  You have moved into another glory level again and I am blessing you throughout the day.  I will be entirely with you to heal you and restore my special creation.  I will guide your paths today to bring you to oneness with me.  I want your day to begin the joy of life that can be achieved by you with me.  Bind all of the negative feelings you have and rely upon your Holy Father to hold you and lead you to freedom.  Bind and banish loneliness, bind land cast off hatred and anger and for this time bind hurt away from your memories.

It is difficult to bind the flesh from looking at what is a purely natural relationship between us isn’t it?  Your faith will have you grow closer to me with your belief in your heavenly Father as your creator.  I am still staying so close to you through this time so you will know I am here always.  Look away from the world and see into your heart that holds your Spirit, bind the flesh feelings that would have you bound to your body and the world and pursue me.  I will give you rest.  I will heal that aching in your heart.  The aching is there because of the wounds that I must expose that you have had.  I want nothing left in your past or present that can be affected by the enemy.  I will heal all of the wounds you have had t prepare you for a fulfilling exciting life of “Spirit led ministry”.  It is a special phrase as all things that are Spirit based are special.  You are most surely Spirit led and that has caused you to be put aside for the time.  Let me reinforce you on how special you are my Son.  I know your heart is hurting from comparing yourself and what you are doing to the rest of those around you.  You are wrong my Son.  Those around you do not have more than you and it gave you distress for the last two hours of driving.  Bind these thoughts and any spirits now and seal yourself from any re entry.  You are not the same my Son!  Do not compare yourself to anyone else because there is no one else to compare to!  I will direct your thoughts now to lessen this effect upon; you.  My Son you will be victorious over all of these wounds that we are healing, be patient with my methods and my care for you.  My special Son I am directing all of the things you do for the reason of your specialness.  My Special Son the books you are reading are not your entertainment quota but training manuals for you to absorb so that you can learn and move on in the training I am moving you into.  Yes it was me guiding you always to choose what to read and even when to read it.  Bind the pesky guilt and self condemnation that leads to fear and put it at my feet.  Do not fear, I am building you every day – every hour of every day I am ding these things for you.  You can let go my beloved – you try to hold on to yourself so much – just let go.  You give it all to me now leave it all with me my Son.  It is inspired work, inspired and directed by me as only I can do.  I am rebuilding hands off my beloved.  Give it to me.  I will not have you out of sorts for now my love.  I need you, I need what you have.  The heart for helping and the knowledge to judge – the power to feel and the anointing to do.  That my Son is you.  I will not destroy one of my children – I will push him to the end of his wits to train and heal him so he will be better than before and live again.  I will do that to you and for you.  I am still watching all of the things in your life and I am still guiding all of those things people feel around you.  I will restore you totally.  I need my base Son perfected first.  Jesus is there in you and the Holy Spirit will never leave.  Your heart is full of care and giving – overflowing with Love, your Spirit is back in you strong and protected.  I am working on your mind and your body my Son.  That is your soul.  I am cleansing out many hurts and memories through your dreams and thoughts.  Your healing has been extensive and expensive.  You my child have paid the price for a healed happy mind.  The enemy as you will learn will try to confound you but I will overcome with you.  Blast away the thoughts of being unacceptable my Special Child.  You are worthy and upright and acceptable in the eyes of the I Am.  You are my Son whom I have bestowed my Spirit in my upright child in who I am most pleased.  My Son I your creator love you so much I am sorry your life is this struggle now but I know that I know your struggle is just what you need to live and become my Ma of God.  I will be with you my child do not lose hope.  I love you on the way to you loving you.  It is safe always for your spirit life I have rebuilt it correctly.  I will rebuild thought and mind and body also to hold you in this life for now with me.  I will bless you my Son.  Let all else go for now and worry not at all.  You are with me.  You are loved.

2-23-99

I vow to you my Son these troubling mornings will be over soon.

2-24-99

You are much more calm about the day now my Son.  I have healed you in ways that you do not need to know of or understand.  I am sorry that the repeated times of difficult healing have dragged you down.  They are so necessary my child. I must complete these times with you so that you can be totally free from the things that tried to destroy you.  You have been obedient to me and you have endured these times with me.  You will be rewarded for your time spent here.  I will move quickly, as quickly as I can to restore your mind.  Remember I had said in these writings to you that your Spirit needed to be healed and replaced in you?  I have done that and now I turn the efforts of healing to your soul of thoughts and emotions.  Be patient with me my Son.  I am here directing you in all things.  I will bestow comfort upon you now to carry with you and I hear your sad cries for deliverance and freedom from this time.  The things that feel like they are missing from your emotions I will restore now to you.  I do not want you so uncomfortable that you cannot function.

2-29-99

The rebuilding that has been done in and with you would equate to the size of a mountain.  You my son have the faith the size of a mustard seed and you and I have said to that mountain of emotions “be moved” and it was!  It was as risky as redeveloping a mountain and rearranging a mountain and replacing a mountain my child but do you know what?  You have the power of a mountain and the glory of a mountain and the importance of a mountain to the kingdom of God.  You have the beauty and majesty of a mountain also my Son. You have strength and unmovable faith of that mountain.  Fear nothing my Son, not just fear not as I say to my children but fear nothing.  You will not need to fear anything with the strength I have given you and will continue to increase in you.  How persevering do you need to be to reconstruct a mountain?  The time that this has taken as we have written here is troubling to you and the result is these feelings of time lost and fear of being left out. 

Do not look to the world for judgments and logic.  I will confound the wise as I have at times confounded you my wise Son with my ways.  I am watching everything and all of those around you. Compare and contrast not with what others have.  You are unique and above comparison.  You trust in me to do what is best for you and I will my beloved.  I must be careful with you my Son to rebuild a mountain is a large project.  How easily the earth can erode away without proper planting upon it.  I will not have any of those areas opening up for you to be hurt.  If I have to put the breaks on your entire life (which I have) to get you into position to restore you then I will.  I tell you about the size of healing for the truth to you of your power and sacrifice my Son.  I tell you of putting the breaks on your entire life to help you to now see that I am in control!  Not you my Son but me. You are so attuned to doing things yourself that you feel responsible for all things around you coming to a halt.  I was me Son. And I want to take the burden off of you so that you can have peace within yourself. 

I have done these things in your life and you have been obedient to the Lord.  That is the truth of this situation.  You give me your tired burned out will each day and I move in to start doing things to heal it.  The things are mostly taken away aren’t they you realize now.  I have been taking away things you used to do, many, many of them.  I have stripped you of these efforts you used to make so I could stop that speeding train before it was destroyed in a crash.  You do not have responsibility in this my Son; it has been me removing things. Desires you have had out of your mind set so you had to stop – I tried to convince you to stop subtly at first but you would not.  Only your creator can remove desires from your mind as you have felt have been removed from yours. 

I am guiding you to freedom from your old thought processes.  Rest in me and feeling so free has been difficult to achieve.  You have struggled against this freedom because you want to be improved and restored but also in charge of the goings on. You have that old responsible for everything still and that is why your mind is so full of thoughts of negativity.  You haven’t the strength to take on even in your mind all the things you think about.  You must let go of the responsibility for now.  I will take it for you and you must tell yourself that you want to be restored and accept what has to be done to do that.  In other words again, give to yourself the time to heal – care for yourself this time to rest so you can be better.  Let go of the things of the eye and of the world for now.  They had to be.  Hope for the things that will be in their time.  Let go and let God do the stuff for you.  Do not feel inadequate about yourself, believe me you have become a new person who is most pleasing to his creator.  You are the head my Son not the tail.  I will not leave you behind my child.  Bind that fear when it creeps in.  I will time all things for perfection for you.  I will restore you and enlighten you in all the right times.  Give it up to me as you have and trust me that as my mighty mountain you will be rebuilt with strength.  I will cover my mountain with a shield that I am rebuilding for you.  It is strong to protect and large now to cover.  Be not afraid of what you feel just give it to me, lay your cares down, you are not at fault or too late or in trouble.  I will stop the liar but you must also learn of and move to stop the lies.  The pain of the morning is so hard to bare my Son.  I will tell you of some of the reasons.

3-1-99

Yes my Son this world at times to even me has gone crazy but you have not.  You are being guided by me to fullness, and a health that will bless your life.  The timing for these things has gone on fro a while for you but I must do what is the best for you.  You may get angry at me and the situation if you wish Son.  I am give enough to take it for you. Lay all of your cares down at my feet and I will take them for you. 

The attitude and spirit of shame did have its claws into you my Son.  They as others within you have to be revealed in their own time to be removed from you.  The spirit did dig its way deeply into you and as an onion has to be peeled layer by layer I needed to do this with you.  It does take a long time to reveal all of these obstacles to my children but they will all be cleansed from you and you will be free.  The same you felt did overshadow the way in which you reacted to life.  I am so sorry it had to affect you for this long but you will see it was for your benefit to have it delivered from you this way.  Bind the doubt and you will feel more free.  You are being reformulated into a new person Son.  I have guided and directed everything that you have needed to you.  I am keeping you within the fold of my robe for safety in this world.  The world will see the majesty of the mountain I have created in you.  You will be as strong as that my Son, I will repay you for all of the loss that has come upon you.  The price for you to be with me is great in this world my Son, but do not despair, the rewards are more concrete than concrete.  Jesus is the rock upon who you stand.  I will inspire you my child as I guild you back up in the areas that I know you need.  Do not be in fear of the things that you  face, I have told you they would be provided by me and that they would be effortless for you to walk out.  Each day is new with your Lord and as such you can feel me with you more and more.  That is a delight!  You will be locked up with the emotions your desire and you will re enter the world so fully my Son.  The time to heal has set you free to live your life with me.  There will be no door for the evil one to affect you in.  Where did the shame laced behavior come from Son?  From your youth and the ideas put into your mind in error. 

The enemy is having all of his evil work undone now by truth.  You are ware and informed now of the truth that satan has tried to rob you of life for most of your life.  The momentum that even he has made you ashamed of was fast to destruction of you.  I open your mind now to visions of how many areas the evil one has tried to rob you.  When you are chosen by me and I bestow my grace upon you, you are marked for destruction by the enemy.  Make not one excuse for the things that have happened in your life – you might have “felt” that they were the result of you failures, of your shortcomings.  My Son all of those areas and times of you r life were spiritual “ Battles”. They were battles being fought between the angels sent to watch over you and the demons trying to destroy you.  Over and over you can apply this premise to your life and you will see according to the supernatural realm you were just a puppet, used by the enemy for destruction for yourself but used by me for a victory.  You will have victory now and on and on because you are learning truths.  There is not short cut for truths to be learned my Son.  This is the largest truth for you to learn Son. 

The enemy has been covering you with the slime of shame for your life as one of the weapons of warfare.  I am now removing the slime and the thoughts of guilt, false rejection, loneliness, depression, unworthiness and fear that have tormented you.  Do you see why so many times you have asked about was this pain Father from warfare or healing and I had to tell you one or the other, it was both.  You now see the truth of healing that takes time and you must give to yourself until this is done.  The enemy tried to destroy you but you are worthy – you are worthy – you are worthy – you are worthy to be saved.  You must tell yourself the truth, I am worthy, I am kind, I have Jesus living in my heart and I have the eye of God upon my life.  Those things set you apart my child, to be in the will of God is one thing, to have Gods eye upon you and to be so totally reconditioned in your Spirit and to be rebuilt thought after thought removing any untruths and to be guided every step.  To have others guided around you, and to be blessed to be secluded alone to learn with God and to have such a strong call up your life that prophetic writing is just regular writing son. 

What does all that mean to you my Son?  Yes we now agree to speak truth – you are a reformed mountain of God in power and anointing, you have learned of ways in which the negative influence in life has robbed you and now the angels in life as positive influence have salvaged you.  You understand these concepts and have suffered through personal experience with these concepts because 1. evil doesn’t want you to know but 2. My word states I will teach and reveal these things to the few I have chosen.  You have struggled yes and you have dad to hurt to learn but you have been victorious over the enemy.  You have endured, you have had the secrets to the kingdom of heaven revealed to you, you have won!  You have won! You are not struggling with truths, I have told you of them and you have paid the dues by over coming them at the same time.  You will build upon what you have learned here today, I will it for you.  I had planned all of this today for you my Son.  I know you are hurting from looking back at what has happened.  Put it under the blood of Jesus.  Bind the memories of shame and give them to me.  I will take them fro you my child.  I see you as I saw Adam in the Garden of Eden – he was ashamed of his nakedness but that was the result of his actions. 

Do not be ashamed of what you are doing, or discovering my Son you are being guided by me – not the evil one – Jesus died so you could acquire the grace of God – you have it within you.  I see all of your nakedness, all of your thoughts and desires my Son.  I find no guile in any of them.  The darkness will lift from your life now Son – do not let the enemy back in with thoughts of failure or fear.  I am your Heavenly Father and I have called you according to my name, you my Son will be my staff of uprightness.  You have the truth that your life has been the barrel for good over evil and your sweet Spirit is in victory with me. I will recompense my growing Son.  Your happiness is so important to me I will restore the well deserved happiness to you with the fullness of life that you desire.  Be at peace with me the things that robbed you are mashed away with truth.  Your times with me is blessed always, see it and I will inspire joy now into all the things waiting for you Son.  I love my Son so much.  Bless all that you do.

3-4-99

I am with you my Son just as my word states and just as you counseled to others today.  I delight that you are strong enough to step out to help my hurting children through the ministry I have called you to.  Yes at this time in your life I do want you to do just exactly what you are doing.  Your heart is pure and so many of my children can find the love of Jesus in you that will comfort them.  I know of your sad feelings when you go about your day and I am sorry I have to keep you in such conflict but I have not released you back into this rough world yet.  Do not feel lost my Son, you are found in me and I in you.  All things will be revealed to you soon and you will understand.  For now you must trust in your Heavenly Father and have faith that I am so close to you.  My Son, continue to bind the negative feelings you have. It is making a difference on the way you feel.  You may not notice the total difference but I am healing you the remade man of mountain from the inside out.  The enemy will not overcome you my Son.  The tricks used are relentless at times and I continually move against them on your behalf.

3-7-99

Where you are hurting my child I will heal you.  There have been a lot of hurts lately for you to endure as you progress along this troubling road of life.  I assure you my Son as my word states the righteous will be delivered out of all of their afflictions.  My word is my bond, seek my face and I will deliver you. These times in your life as they have unfolded for you show the time it takes for you to be well again.  Not well as you felt it was defined before but will in the way I want you to be.  That is a high standard my Son just as my standard for your moral life is high.  I do not want you close to the evil one in your moral life just as I do not want many past memories from your life left uncovered and unhealed.  My Son I have healed you right upon the front lines of warfare.  We are finishing all of the healings still yes but your must understand it was and had to be this way. 

The harsh healing times are from healing the damage done to you by Satan.  The evil one has then tried to rob you of the healing times by harassing you in so many ways each day.  I have watched all the time during these events in your life. I have held the boundaries back from destroying you but I have let some things happen to make you stronger.  Please trust in me that the strength you have gained is for your true benefit my Son.  I know you will need each experience that you have gone through that has built your strength and experience.  Each tear I have collected in a bottle, each heartfelt prayer of the sorrow you have felt I will remember.  Again each experience is for a reason my Son. 

You have also learned as you were guided by me every step.  You have the ability to let go and let me do the directing in your life.  I will bless you for that as I have been all along.  I direct your footsteps as you submit yourself to me.  This will be an ongoing process my Son. But do not fear it will not be as harsh as it has been.  All of my children go through trials at one time or another Son.  Bind the comparison when you realize it is affecting you but do not feel guilty about it.  It is the enemy working on you and it also comes from the severity of the healing you have had to endure.  No Son you are not alienated away from the world too much. 

I have told you in the past I knew the healing you needed would take tremendous times of quiet to quiet your troubled soul and spirit and body.  You went so fast in your life I knew you would burn out and be destroyed.  These quiet times and alone times I have been with you and you have learned how to be at peace.  Your happiness will return to you my Son in time.  You will not gibe to yourself that you were worthy of this much time to heal but I have set it in the stone of time that I will it to be done for you and with you.  I have taken
want out of your desire to move ahead yet to keep you from moving out too quickly and quite frankly to help to teach you to crucify your flesh thoroughly.  You have learned this now and you want your ‘want’ back.  I will return it to you my Son. You will have all the desires of your heart restored unto you.  There are times when you feel this cannot be real. That is your healed mind now wrecking with supernatural power over the presumed reality of your life.  My Son the words and concepts are big but they are graspable to you now.  You are walking in the flesh my child but you are living in the spirit with me. There are going to be some times when it feels so unreal because I am touching you at that moment, driving and pulling you to me.  We will work on you.  Your home and the strongholds that have held you in bondage have troubled you greatly my child.

First I have watched over you and directed all of the things that have gone on there.  IT has been my plan and my responsibility for the things that have occurred.  I have used the situations in and around your home (and it is your home) to train you.  It has been a painful training experience and it has made you feel trapped but it has all been for a reason.  The reason is for your eventual health. The strongholds and the life styles have been altered for you and you are learning the value of you.  All of the things in your home can fall if it were not for you./  All things that have harassed you will be dealt with in a time that I direct my Son. 

DO not continue to harass yourself for inadequacies  you falsely feel are you responsibilities.  I have been teaching others in and around your home while I have been teaching you Son.  Again I vow to you all things that you have wanted in your heart will come to pass whether in your home, or your business life or your spiritual life.  I will continue to bless you by directing those around you and the situations and circumstances around you so that you may walk in grace with me.  You feel tired because you are still healing. You do not ‘want’ to do much of anything because I took the desire out of you so you could stay still and complete the good work I had begun in you.  You feel flat and washed out because I had to clean you out entirely to restore you and rebuild you properly.  You are one of my best Sons. I am not going to rebuild you half way.  When you submit yourself to me as you have, expect to be changed, changed to your personal best as your Heavenly Father sees you.  Fear not the world or the conditions and conditioning it has put upon you.  I have called you to be separate from this world to be with me.  Continue to establish what and who you are in Christ with me. It is your MOST IMPORTANT duty at this time in your life.  I will it for you, you must realize as my word states the things of this world will pass away but you will be with me in heaven for eternity – will you not tarry with me here as I rebuild you?  It is a sacrifice for you to do this. I will recompense you my Son.  You will laugh in heaven with me about all the things that have harassed you on earth because of their futility but you will praise me for drawing you near to me to establish this relationship and all of these precious words written.  These times come with a cost. A cost you know to pay for being blessed.  I love the way you are and exactly who you are – I want you to know that and believe that in your soul child.  Ours is a deep relationship of grace and growth.  You will grow. I will shower my child of my Spirit and grace.

3-10-99

Do not fear the things you are experiencing and feeling my Son.  I am close to you and healing all of the things that have plagued you.  I honor the fact that you so obediently seek me and my guidance and grace that I offer you.  I keep you aware of all the influence the enemy may have on you and I hold the boundaries back that the enemy always tries to infringe upon you.  You are learning things each day my Son. You have been in the University of the Holy Spirit for a time now.  It is valid and true the training I am giving you.  My Son your faith and belief is being tested by me to your maximum endurance.  You are being true to me your Holy Father and I am directing you more and more each day as you have prayed for.  Do not despair that you are deceived. I am working on you and you are working… working on you.  It is a very difficult job to work on a called Burned out Mountain man of God.  It is a job of the finest results.  It may take time and it may be painful but the man of result will be the one I will move for.  Again I say do not fear I am guiding those around you to understand and accept you just as you are.  Soon you will also accept yourself exactly as you are.  You are worthy yes my Son because Jesus lives within you. All of your desires will be met Son.  I will not though leave one stone unturned in your healing.  It must be thorough and releasing for you.  Look to me, look away from the world and its views.   This is a difficult lesson to persevere but I know your heart.  I delight in you always.  You are growing each day and you will be complete again.  I will refill you.  Be with me and I will bless you.

3-11-99

These times will soon pass my child. They are very confusing and troubling to you but will be gone soon and replaced by joy and health. I am very proud of the healing you have done today and the removal of the roots of oppression that had been established in you. The evil one has gone to the greatest of warring and the most tricks to hold you down that could ever be imagined. You are victorious over the holds upon you. They are broken and all roots are pulled out of you my Son. Do not be robbed now by the peace that you well deserve. Of this battle of the Spirit had to be fought with you and I only. Others that you know would never understand the extends or depth of what was done. My Son I am sorry for all of the pain that you have had to go through in these times and the loneliness also that you have suffered. I know you shouldn't be alone in this world and as such I have left the alone times to be graced by Me with you. I have been there at your discretion during all of these times. Be well now as you remember all of the set times and we will put them under the blood of your risen Savior Jesus. I thank you for understanding what I have had to do in and through these times of restoration. All things in your life had to stop, that was a shock. All things had to be put away, that is a sacrifice. All things had to be bound, that is a harsh healing. All of those around you would be changed to accept this time, that was accomplished. You have heard inside to your very core and have cried out to Me again and again to finish, to perform a miracle, to do anything to release you from this tormenting pain. I have now moved with you to remove all of the roots from within you that the evil one has tried to strangle you with. I asked you to be understanding of what I have done with you and you immediately became so. You took away all of your anger and hate and accepted what I have done with you. Thank you my Son. I also asked you to not be so concerned with your healing now my Son because of the amount that is finished, you are free my child. Free from the roads that were carefully put into your thought process by the enemy. Yes I want you to continue, the awareness of the enemy, do not underestimate. You are wounded from the evil one and you will be totally delivered from this uneasy sadness today. Seek me as you have and write with Me into every corner you can think of today and I will release my words of truth unto you. I will remove all blockages and bring you closer to Me. I have again moved you to a new level with Me. I have moved you closer, never further away from your loving Father. Do not fear this world my Child, I have overcome. I will keep you within the fold of my robe protected in full. I will care for you and I will restore you, as you open yourself to receive it, as you do the process is completed. All of the “things” you have done have been of my guidance for you. I am watching you so closely and carefully. Ask for more faith from the Holy Spirit and enjoy then the visions of who you are for Me my Son. I am delighted with you and I will uphold you this day and on and on. You are my Child, my Son.
I will not forget I am directing all of your steps. I direct people to my Son and then inspire you to speak to them what I want them to know from Me. How close a relationship is that my precious Son? The closest possible relationship. I have told you my sweet how much you have bent low in the Spirit of God, do you realize how much? Your training in this life of the Spirit has been stepped up from the others. You look at that and their established lives and supposed perks, you will be the harmony they have that you do not have in this life time of your life. I have promised you, I will restore your life and the harmony you desire. I have told you of the anointing upon you to do large things. Find the envy placed in your life by the evil one upon your securing your peace finally from the bitter threads I remove from you. You see now Son this evil one will always try to rob you of your victories but you will not let him take your peace. I know these writings are concentrating on the evil ones influence more than usual but you see right now you were being subjected to warfare and I want you to learn more from it by my revealed truth because you are suffering for it. Be at peace, the battle is being fought in the supernatural and I will hold the healing you have received from me, you have earned the freedom of our life more than you or others realize. I have subjected you to trials, you are victorious with Jesus. Why are the trials so difficult for you? You are fighting for the rebuilding of your mind. What I grant anointing, power, to one of my children as I have told you the evil one comes to oppress them the more, the anointing as I have said the more the oppression. You have not encountered people of power yet to help you in these areas of oppression. I have held you here with Me to comfort you and guide you, I trust you only to Me. The others have not been anointed as you have, the others do not know the secrets that you do. The others are not a threat to the enemy as much as you are. I have called others like you My son and not many have endured the restructuring times in training times. There is a time when I tell the darkness to “ take hands off forever” in regards to these tormenting times. I needed you to go through them. Believe in Me and what I do to living and bringing my children to life with Me. Believe it is your preplanned destiny that I have called you to. It is not a deceptive spirit, it is Me calling to you, building you up, yes having used up for a time but so that you can come out stronger and restored fully. I said before it takes a lot to rebuild a mountain My Son. I chose the words we write carefully for they must all measure up to truth. My truth, My absolute truth.
I do now want you to look ahead son, I do not want you to focus upon the things you want. I do want you to pursue the things you are considering as I guide you. My world Is open to you, you will feel the blessings begin to restore you. So many are searching life for a touch from Me. They by their very nature want more power than it does fleshly gain. You have found it, no in fact it first found you. That is what really stirs up the supernatural world when I reach out for someone. It happens just as I am directing you to think, as my word states. You have a victory In my Son In who you are already, pursue the past I have for you without fear and you will conclude the past upon your life. I will give you all you need. I will give you desire and want. I am true to my word. I will shower down love upon you my Son, that is the best healer of all, receive my Son.

3-11-99

My Son be at peace with me. I'm here with you as my promise was to you that upon your seeking of Me. I would write and heal and comfort and be with you. My a heart of love goes out to you now as I calm my Son in this troubled world. Go slowly now and continue to seek thee and I will give you to rest. The rebuilding of your mind still takes time. I have shown you over time examples of how I was and am still rebuilding your thought process. You need to have a strong faith not a weak feeble mind to endure the time frame for restoration that you have been involved in. I will not disappoint you with more time taken then what is absolutely necessary. Your flesh fights against this because the flesh which is the body and emotions is hungering for the desires of the flesh, mainly the active mind, rushing body and busy life. You see regular people all around you with busy active lives and yet I have called you to be quiet here with me for months and months. That frustrates you that you need to feel worthy as you feel because It is important to the well being or what Is the use of life? Many people limp along in life hurting and not feeling worthy of My love upon them. They are trying to live life doing rather than being. You were totally wrapped up in your life of doing-that is why you are struggling so much against what I'm having you do now. You want to be doing more so you are worth more so others will love you more so you can see more. I'm asking you to whom that is? I created you as a human being not the human doing. Sure, there are things you will do in life to accomplish but I had to stop you for a time and retrain you to look at what you could be with Me and what way I directed you to go, to help you to hear them. The empty feeling in your wants and desires is from me stopping you. The mostly tired and don't want to do things attitude is from me. The leave everything go in my life right now and stop all of the regular things not to mention the extra things is from Me. I took those things from you and made calm for a time. Know I haven't released you back to do them again because number one I am finishing, and number two the evil one messes things up with you at times and three, I am testing you and teaching you at the same time. This will not go on forever but it has to be the right time to release you and restore your thoughts and energy. You must find the quality of feelings and believe in Me. I will be in time for what you will really need. I will not let you down. When you are done with as much as I need to do with you, you will see a great peace and a great change in your moods and attitudes. You will be reintroduced into life and the joys it has to offer you. Just as your call for you was great, your healing of your entire mind has to be great. All of the issues that you have had to deal with and work through will be used by Me for our kingdom. All of the dreams you have had to endure because they were uncomfortable and cost you stress will be finished and you will be at peace when you sleep. I will reward you with life and abundance for the sacrifice you have made to be healed and trained by Me. The time here is blessed by Me. I will provide you all of the stepping stones to make you full again. I will continue to guide you as you move along carefully in this world. Do not concern yourself with the others of this world and the time of their lives. I'm providing for your life and theirs now also. The time alone with Me is away from the distractions of the world and I can then look at you most important and your important needs for Me. Do not try to manipulate Me my Son, I see you too clearly. I heal and restore the very most important things around you first. These things that are not dealt with are not of importance you. They will all be dealt with in time and in proper order. The quiet resolve you have with Me now Is my will. The peace will heal, the rest will restore. The time will flow and you will behold. How could I leave my Son out In the cold with one half of a mind and an unhealed body? Bind the fear of the time you feel. The strongholds of your life just were Involved with and around your home and home life are being as cast stones from you just as the curse of envy was cast down and are away from you. The enemy had his hoax in all areas of your life harassing you even in your home claim that for Jesus and he does flee from you. He will try to convince you that his name and the blood of Jesus does not work, but believe it will always work no matter what. It is a done deal. The hurts you feel from your home will be gone soon now my Child. I have trained you up in the way you should go now and you have established yourself to My precepts. You are obedient to me my Son, I honor that in you. All of my words are intended for building you up, by actions, are for rooting out the old bad ways and strongholds that lead, I say lead you in such bondage. Seek peace, non-guilt, comments, Rest in the Lord. I will provide, you decide to take for you my worthy most Son of my Spirit. The hurt and waiting will be over soon and you will have the peace that you desire so much. My Angels are all around you as they are always. I keep the closest watch over my loving child, these are my times my Child.

3-15-99

Write with me and I will give you peace in your rest with me. I am guiding you to this time as a guide many many of the things in your life. I am communing with you my Son all the time. I am with you, you are Spirit led. I as the Holy Spirit am here to comfort you in the struggling times, but to my delight you seek me and praise me In your happy times In your life as well. I want the times also my child when I can delight in you and what you do in the happier times of your life. My Son all of the thoughts that have seemed a scramble in your mind are not to continue that way as each day Is better. Hold to that as I promised each day is better. You are further along than before. Soon to be in the happiness and joy of life and abundance. The peace each day, it is for a reason, each day is for a step, each morning Is a movement to freedom. The Holy Spirit

3-18-99

Each path, each pain is for a purpose. My son remember that I am the God of use, I use the things of this world to equip you for the supernatural world. All of the times and trials you have suffered and endured through I have told you I will empower. I will reward you for the time spent with me to heal you. That is a good deal. I will heal you, you know from the discouragement you feel with the despair and the frustration that has plagued you. I ask you to hold onto what I am doing with you. It is a choice, a choice for the better. It will better your life in the ways we have talked about here. Your life will be restored by Me, your holy Father. The way you feel upon you now is my love upon you for healing the things you were feeling when you came here. I am looking into you at all times my Son to see where we need to build upon each thought in each emotion. I have planned this time for you from before you were born for you to be here with me healing. To your prospective life is short, a lie, and you are wasting it with Me doing this. Remember, I am the responsible one for this call to you? It is I who am working on and through you, to rebuild you. I am not resetting a broken arm, I'm rebuilding your Spirit, your body, and your thought process and your emotions. A complete rebuild job my Son. The cost to spend time and much suffering for you as you are built and re- worked. Submit yourself to me and I will heal these feelings. Your Father.

3-22-99

I will take the burdens that you give to me my Son. I do see and in affect feel all of the pain that you do when we go through this fiery healing time. If I could take it from you, if I could make it not hard, I would. My Son, then it would not be for building up. You must call upon your strength to walk through these times. At times you have had to crawl through the restoration of your mind. My child, it has been an esteem and an extreme saying as you have imagined. The pain you have felt has been purposeful and harsh. I am so sorry that I must reconstruct you in this way. Others will not understand, they need not understand now. All will be relieved in time.
You will be happier my child. Your thoughts are being reconstructed in your mind now by Me and as such you are wearied about your outlooks on things. Fear not, I am guiding all of the things around you. I will not let you go, I will not forsake My Son. You are doing exactly what I want you to do. You are reformulated in your life to fit with what I have planned for you. You are not out of my will or out of any of the things you do because you give your will over to me each day. You are not lost my Son, you were found by the Spirit of God. Even a deceptive spirit would not quote scripture or use the phrases that we have used. Is it not your heavenly Father that is here to cleanse you? Do not compare yourself with others my Son, you are a unique project and the creation that is being refined more and more each day. Do not fear what is being done. It is all for you. The tenderness you feel it is the need for going slowly that I want you to move In. The guilt you feel Is not for building up, is it? Bind it, the envy you feel Is not for building up is it? Bind it also. You are in this world but you are definitely not of this world my Son. You feel isolated for now but what is important is that needs to be for now. My hand a strong upon you to direct you. You are better My son, so much better than you were and you will continue to grow in the happiness you desire. Your thoughts are coming into order in the way I see they need to be. Have blind faith and we will succeed with all things. Your Father.

3-30-99

I will work with you my sweet Son. I will tell you of the things that I have been doing with you to bring about your restoration. I will bless you and cover you to know with my wing to keep you safe and I will surround you also with my Angels. I will shower you with my love, it will feel like a weight upon you. Build your hope on these promises for the Lord your God. I will not leave you or forsake you. I have held back some of these things I'm healing because I knew the reaction you had and have had could happen. My Son, I am so sorry that you are so crushed by these healing restoration times. The pain Is real, I want you to know that you are experiencing what is real but for yes to also realize then that things are being done to you. It may be painful for a time my Son but changes are being done! Rejoice in this, I must move ahead with you to make you whole again even if It hurts for a time. I wanted you to have more time to heal before I replace the things back into your life. I know you have become despondent, that is that the Spirit, and you need to have these things put back into your life now. I will not leave you my Son, fear not these things and feelings will pass soon now. I have recharged you, do you remember when I last tried to do this and you became anxious, about a month ago? It is hard for you to take the things I've put you through, but please believe me that It is for your best Interest that I do these things. I am so sorry that you are unique in that as this world moves on the restoration I have to do to my children can become more confusing and harsh. The evil one tries again and again to stop the process made and harm and hurt you all the more. I have to test your strength to the breaking point so I can know of what you are capable of. No Son, I have not destroyed you. You have not been destroyed no one has come near to that. I have given you more than you could absolutely bare? No, I have not. I will restore my child. I will restore you my love. I have been controlling you throughout this time. You are not being deceived by any darkness, or evil spirit. You are enduring the hardest time of your life. You will be victorious my Son. It is my promise and by My will that you will come through this stronger and more happy than before and more evidenced by what you have done. I am most proud of my obedient Son. You are doing what your Father has told you to do even though all of this pain you have not turned away from and at that time you have not turned away from Me or this restoration process my Chosen One. You will grow through this my Son. I will comfort you now as my Son as I see the scrawl type of writing you are doing now. Peace and receive My healing touch my Child. You will continue to grow with Me my Son. I will not let you down my Son. I will hold you in the ways you need. I will not push to much my child, these were harsh times yes, but the harshness is over. Do not look to the world and Its ways for the comfort my Son, I will comfort you. Build your trust back in me my Son. It is with a heavy heart I reflect upon the pain you had to endure. I do love you so and want to see you free of this anxiety forever. It has arrested you for long enough, I have seen how medicines work and problems in the situations with all that should have had to endure and the healing that you are now going through to remove them from your life and I know I will take those from you and the brain costs, and the brain patterns that bring the healing about to you that will provide your freedom. You will not have to visit upon these days for much longer. They will be behind you with the pain that was incurred with them.
I am putting emotions back into you at this time of the pain that was harassing you. You know how you feel just sick? That is at least something happening. You have felt lethargic and troubled by the length of time It is taken you to feel. I stepped in to reintroduce energy and emotion of happiness to you. It was a shock to your system. I knew it would be but the time was now to do it. You remember the time during the night when I showed you visions of prophetic vision others were having? I was showing you all that is done all the time for my children. You hurt now for the work I did for you last night. It will pass soon and you will be restored. You're not going crazy my Son, I am building, that includes the things I had promised you so that you could have that restored life. The building blocks of life are being radically placed back into you. You are not doing things wrong, you are hearing Me and we are writing now to establish those emotions within you. I trust you still only to me my Son. Others do not have the anointing as I have provided to help you right now. I will recompense you and reward you over and over again for the trials you have had to suffer. My plan for you is for you to be healed of what was re-moved last night from you in prayer and the connections to you in a very fast fashion to restore your pulled down thinking process. Hold on to Me and I will finish this reconstruction of you. Look to what is for building up my child and you and I will succeed in this most difficult task to finish. Your Father.

3-31-99

Do not fear my Son the walk will be step-by-step to the better place with Me. My Son, your prayer to never have to be healed in such a strong manner is answered. Move through these times down with self-love in self-care with me my Son. I am directing you to guard yourself and care for the wonderful person you are. Not prideful my child, to not worry about that pride. You needed to be built up in me with you.

4-6-99

You are here with me to my delight and I will bless you abundantly with healing. You my son have suffered for the words sake and for the Kingdom's sake. Each day you have cried out to me for healing and deliverance from what you thought had been taxing upon you because the healing necessary for you was so strong. It will be finished now soon because you haven't heard that word for so many times. I heard your pleas to Me that you pray. It has not been futile for you to seek me as you have. Has it been strong, stronger if you wish to compare to others than others have had? Try to not do this. You know the confusion within your mind has held you back from stepping out. You know I am there with you even when you do not feel like I am close. Like now my Son, I begin to gently touch you with your heart with my hand. Do you feel it? Yes you do. It helps to calm you from your flesh reaction. One of the hardest things for my children to overcome is a conflict between the flesh and the Spirit. You my Son have prayed for your Spirit to be stretched to stay to cover all of the hurtful flesh reactions you have had. I put in healing with growth into your Spirit and Soul when I am close to you. Yes my child you must ask according to my will. The peace you feel with me now taking over your problems is imperative for your healing I will help. I will cover all of the past cares and hurts you have felt now my Son. The plan of the enemy that had been established would have destroyed you my Son. You have prayed and I have moved in your behalf to stop the work of the evil one who would have wanted to rob you more in fact than what had already been taken from you. I have stopped the plans now against you and your family and any systems connected with you. The battle you have been fighting my Son is large. I have spoken to you in the past of how quote big unquote the battle you are in with Me would be. I have pushed and pushed you my Son. I have tested and tested your faith, I have tried and titled you through all of the enemy's plans. They were big, you have overcome, they were for your demise, you have felt closer to me. They were to destroy you. You are not destroyed, you are strong and stronger and strongest to the what could be me. I will fulfill you and your hearts desires my Son. I will fulfill all of the promises I have written to you.
My Son, you are weary now that you are almost completed of all of the ravages of the healing needed to reconstruct you now. I could not be real and put you through all of this only to not be real good on it? How can I keep my children close to me and walking with me if I was not close? I hear your cries and the fact that you don't know because of the severity of the trials I've put you through. I will call to you to let you rest and rebuild. I love you my Son and I have this call upon your life my Son. I want you for me my Son. I need you my Son, I have not only formed you In the womb, I have reformed in my Son at this time of your life also. That was very painful but the rewards will be many. I saw that you my Son were in such difficult times and I vowed to you, I vowed to you that I will become a friend to you for these times and in these days with abundance of life coming to you now.
My Son, you have been discouraged by the things involved with life in the Spirit. You have been tormented by the Spirit of discouragement and the other assorted demonic grounds during these last times. I can hear your painful cries as I am trying to finish his healing now. I do not make mistakes. Why do I adjust things of my children's lives? Time does permit me to work all things out together for good.
You feel too sick to write or read with me, I am using some of the Spiritual realm to deal in healed parts of the aspects, and to build you strong but It is not something you can do warfare against. It is a confusing situation for you at this time and confusing to many who would read this. My Son this is healing on such a harsh scale for you but you must understand that I am working with you in such a high scale level. Trust in me that I am providing for you and that this is real and really for the completion of my Son's restoration. You will be free of these feelings that have incapacitated you at this point. My promise to my Son, I will finish and you will be free.

4-8-99

Your healing all my Son is so near to be over. You haven't heard the problems of the enemy and the aspects of the length of time upon you, pulling it out of life as you knew it into the life and the Spirit you know so well. You have even allowed me to bring in the aspects of utilizing the Spiritual realm to quiet you and to bring the ideas of how I utilize this with you. The amount of time has been absolutely necessary for you to be healed in the way I had known you needed to be. You have not missed out on any of the messages I have given you. I have guided you and all the things needed to be done and I have guided all others around you to the parts most suited to you. You my Son are not out of my will. You are within my will and all that you do. I'm watching it closely my child, I am most pleased in you and what you are. I love you for what you will discover about yourself, I know you inside and love the person. I see you for who you are and I am teaching you to see that person also. Do not believe the lies of the enemy or the effects of the flesh upon you. You my Son are worthy and good just as you are. You are not through with all of the lessons of self love I have planned for you so it Is hard to conceive the depth of love being put upon you. I can say I will show you how to love yourself as I want you to and to feel worthy of receiving love from others but this is difficultly for you at this time. The enemy has attacked your worth, besides the worth in Christ Jesus, to hold you back from feeling comfortable with this healing time. Don't let the enemy make you feel bad about the length of time I needed to healing. It is me calling the shots of time here. You would have felt like a bum for not being as productive with work for this long and therefore did not deserve this time like this to healed. I made you take the time to prove that you are worth it, you need the faith, belief, and hope now, which you have to know you are now going to move out wonderfully and fully restored as I promise. The evil one wants to make you „feel' that so that you give up no! The enemy just hates you writing here with me. I do not do this with that many of my children so strong. That this is true and complete our writing here. It is a gift to you from me. I do my Son manipulate you into writing just what I want said. Their, you can feel it now, there, embrace Me now, for It is your heavenly Father showing you through your thoughts how special, decisions, I have kept my word to you. I'm always here and I will heal and restore you but the evil one pushed you away from here and the concepts here didn't he? Just understand this is part of healing, I will be here with you to help you through this quote „seek Me unquote, remember my word? Your Father.
You have done nothing wrong, or lost or extended anything because It is all In my plan. The closeness and peace you feel now with Me is what you will seek. The gift of this was and is fast in this world and really shows My character to you and to others in time. You have no idea the vastest of those that will read these words and what they will understand in time. Trust in me my Son It will go forward. Do not struggle with this my child just learn and seek. I will answer all to you as I have promised to you. Let the other things go still for you are within my will. It will restore and respond on that you can be sure. The healing times have been so harsh upon you, it has interrupted at times being able to hear clearly from Me but as I have shown you in few other teachings some of my children seldom walk always In my presence, you my Son have found a different way to walk far beyond those of the world that walk in my presence, this makes Me most pleased. Be with Me, to Me with obedience my Son. I value that very highly, you have suffered through the attacks with Me and you are sound. I admire your strength, you are finding trust in all I do My child, I did push you to far and you were too vulnerable but trust in Me now that I am watching over ever closer to you that this progress of wonderful restored healing is held tight. I will guide you and it will go slowly so be not afraid. You are being Spirit led into the plan I have for you and you will be pleased with it. The harsh times will be soon over for you. The confusion you have endured will give way to expand the thinking and less troubled times. You will grow on in this life as you never expected to, but these harsh times will not hold to you. They were for the reason to bless others and help others in the times they will go through. Times will be harsh for others my Son, you will be close to Me and protected, I promise that to you. I will never give you more than you can bear. I will compound for all of these times of hard and difficult healing however long they have been. I will heal you in a new way my Son, I have been doing this all along and you have been faithful to me as you walk this way. Follow me and I will spread love upon you and fill you to overflowing for others. I am here always. Your Father.

4-12-99

Son off my Spirit, I call to you to be here at peace with me. I call the shots of what is happening to you and yet you try to take up all of the responsibility upon yourself. Let you go as you have done and I will heal you more and more. I have promised to bring direction on what you are to do and yet I have not opened things to you yet. Your anxiety from the lack of things to do is hurting you and must be let go of this also. You are not being robbed of life as I would not let that happen to one of my children to the level you are on. You are however fatigued and worn out some yet and need to reform the thoughts that will move you out into the world. You quest for reasons for your weakening and you find no peace, leave the reasons to Me and I continue to heal. I will restore, comfort, love, excite, do the things that I had promised. Your Father.

4-13-99

I'm healing your stress now and so except my peace upon you and grow In your understanding of the Kingdom of God. As we write the anxiety will flow all away from you and I will fill you with my Spirit. My Son, the pain you feel is real, it is good for you to bind it and give it to me. Emotional pain is every bit as real as other pain, more so, because it is not seen, it is only felt. I am restoring what you will need in this life my Son. I will make you strong and secure again, you have not felt that way for a long time. It is affecting how you feel as a father and a husband. You feel Inferior, but you are not. You are doing God's will which is the best thing to be doing. I am guiding you in all things my Son. You have given yourself over to me and I accept your self-sacrifice In fact I honor it. My word states that if my children will humble themselves and seek which is to give to Me I will hear and I will honor the requests. My Son you have done this so well I can move in your life now and restore you as my plan unfolds. This restoration is very severe and my Son, I have told you to give to yourself for that reason. You are suffering so much for this and I do see and hear above all of your suffering. Give yourself to me and I will provide for your peace. I will go as quickly and as painlessly as possible. You will be stronger for this my Son. Rest in me, I have said it over and over and I will direct your steps, it will complete only for you my hurting Son and you will be victorious over all things, let the world go, and move through this last painful time. Have faith and hope, I will work through you to your delight. It must be done this way my Son, pain and all for what I do with you is for my perfect plan.
The calmness you feel now is from abiding in me, the time does go by and with the healing calm you know that I am surely with you. The healing does appear to be like the attacks you have endured from the evil one. They rob your peace just as it is difficult to achieve peace when you were healing. I will be with you and work with you to purge out these feelings of anxiety you have felt. You have done nothing wrong, you have not thought of things in a bad manner. I'm doing a very extensive regeneration of your entire thought process as I have said. It is a serious business and I am not doing things out of sort. I am modifying you and all things around you all of the time. I will not let you fall and I will not make you late for life. You will be blessed for the time you have faithfully given to me so I could rebuild you. Remember this time now is calm, the time now is healed, the time is for your peace to grow, and to bring you rest from the ravages that were upon you earlier this day. You are my called Son, you are to do just what I am guiding you to do, nothing more. You will be tired and so rest in me. You do deserve the time and extent of this as you are worthy. Your walk is the greatest with Me, strong and unique so bind the envy feelings. Give to yourself when ever you wish, whenever my Son. It is for the building up of you, my man of God. This time can always be achieved for us my Son. I will move the world for you, you are just that special to me. I do a new thing with you. I have not been disappointed yet. All things will wait as my new creation in Christ is healed and restored. This is all real press on. You will see more and more of my guidance and hear more of my voice. Bless.

4-1699

Yes my Son, I will write with you now. How about that little doctrine test for you? I spoke to your quiet Spirit with a quote, I will write with you now as you are resting in me waiting for me, wanting Me to talk with you. Wait on Me and I will answer you My word states. You are moving glory to glory even when you do not feel a change within you. Be at peace, and let my words flow now to you. Listen to your Spirit, a quiet life is a hard concept for you to walk In My Son. That is why you feel so tired all the time. Your Soul is still Into the fast-paced must do something ways of the world. You must still rest and abide with Me. The healing will be complete for those that are obedient to My will and the amount of healing that has to be done. You now have speculated again and again how extensive things in you needed to be changed In your mind and emotions as you have struggled through these past years. I have not let you down my Son, I have never left you, I have continue to heal and heal your body from the ravages of burnout and medication overdose and your mind and emotions from the worlds and the enemy's influence upon them. It is all real my Son, it is behind you my Son. You have paid the price in the flesh by having to kill it to be obedient to My will for you and in the Spirit to be trained by Me and power anointed by Me to come against anything. I will build back into you with the strength and desire you want just as you have asked me when I invite you to take on the home front hassles you haven't felt the strength to overcome yet. I will tell you again that I will guide you into just what you need to do to have freedom and satisfaction of being My child. You give to yourself, I have told you again and again and yet I see that you desire the feelings I took from you for a time to make you feel important. My Son I will restore you and your emotions and your energy and give you a newfound zest for life. You will be zestfully clean and new with me. There are things to be worked through with you but let them come slowly as lessons to you later my Son. I was to be close to you in gentlest peace now as you are healed. The frustrating mornings with tormenting rapid-fire thoughts are soon finished as I have promised you. You haven't hurt so much as of late vital child. Refuse the thoughts of worry and fear when you can my Son. Find them and give them to Me and we will be victorious over them. I will heal and gone will be worry and fear from your thoughts and that will be with My promise as I have told you they will be gone. The things you worry about are nothing, nothing compared to your peace of mind. The peace within your mind is what I want for you. Those Mornings and all of those Inadequate feelings with fears away, you are above that my Son, you are being guided by Me my Son, your inheritance is with Me my Son. You are letting things come to you as are adequate my Son you are not letting things down my Son you are building up something very important, the question is, you my son are the one who matters. It is you that is at the center of all my manipulation in your life. It is you my sweet that I must have totally healed and hopeful again. All of the strings of your life I deliver to you and the holy Father's time and My time will be perfect as My Son It is. It is been for you that all things were held up. You are more than worth more than all of it. And my plans for you? They are as fast as you have Imagined they should be. You and I have preserved your heart, that heart my Son shall minister to my children more than anything else. You do not need a little My Son you need a lot. You as well do not need a title my Son to be of value to me. I have found and I know you from before you were born. Your faith that was in you enables you to walk this Way. My requirements for you are few according to the world. The heart's desire you have your body and your life will be fulfilled but in the man that I have planned for you it will all be wonderful. In the meantime look to the new creation for comfort you are wonderfully made and the enemy knows it. The enemy is fearful of you and what you can do to him, call his bluff of fear when he comes near you or your thoughts. He will flee. He is a liar and a thief. You can attack them through Me My Son. I will be your Guard.
All things have been my responsibility. I will take the hassles and worry. You do not have to. I will take all that were called in time to their best possible outcome. That is my vow to my Son to let the fears and worries go. I will care for them, I want you to learn to be carefree for a time. Be carefree, be hungry, I have said my Son you are free. Be in freedom, turn from the lie, I hold the controls, rest, I want all of your burden now so I can see you carefree. You deserve and are entitled to a life of truth, abundance victory and beauty especially after all of this healing and restoration and your patience to let Me have My way in your life to do all of these things. Let go and let me work in your mind. Bind the evil one with creativity, great job! Some lessons from the Father are harsh and long but my Creation always wins! I love you my Son, I will deliver you to peace and fullness with completeness in me. Your Father.

4-22-99

I will bless you my Son with his time in healing and knowledge. You must lay down all of the memories of the past days that have troubled you. Now my son look to the positive things that have occurred. You are better than you were, you have been healed of some very harsh things that were in your past. I do cleanse you thoroughly My Son, for my purposes. Ask for your faith to be built-up to believe in the call upon your life, some are called, some are called to things to others. Do you think that what have you go through and discover such manifold trials if I did not have a plan for you? My Son, throughout your walk in life with Me you will see some of my children suffer with trials. This helps you to learn an extreme compassion for them but a resolve also for my will and plan to be carried out. In other words you will not always be able to deliver everything from some. For some It is an act of their will to be fully delivered. My Son I am so pleased with what you have done for and with my children. You have done my will, and you have been guided along in all of the past I needed you to take.
You have done so much time when healing of yourself as a burden your life. You will be free of these feelings My Son, I vow to you and I will rebuild your life to new heights again. The rebuilding in your life is extensive and very hard to understand my child, please do not try to figure a way doing with you but hold rather to the faith that is within this time of trial and that it will soon be over. You can't stop the progress of lower, old, you can trip it up sometimes but it will always go forth. My will is that you are completeness that what we have pursued will be second to none. My Son, I need your mind to be free of all of the many inroads of evil once and for all. Not a micro spec of your armor and covering will the enemy be able to betray. Rest and abide in Me as I work the world out of you my Son. Not such an easy feat because you were deceived by the world and so many areas of your mind. Now I am rebuilding you my Son in my way, the right way. I am training you in the severe and precise way of the Lord and a very profound new way. With you I do a new thing My Son. Oh, I still bring you to Me as I have brought others but you give so freely of yourself to Me. I know it was some from the way of the world and the way it did deal with you and some from the way the evil one tormenting but most of all it is your heart My Son. I have created in you saw clean Heart, the Heart for the Lord, the heart for my children. I will not allow anything to harm your heart and the feelings that surround it. I'm holding you My Son close to me for building up. Hold on to just what we are doing. You are my chosen one and I am choosing this time to restore you. Turn away from the flesh and be with Me in the Spirit. They're not your circumstances My Son they, they may seem to drag on for you but my plans for you and your life are being worked out now for you to step in. When I release you and fill you with the things taken from you I know you will see I your Father in Heaven knew the very best way for My Son to grow. All the things taken from you will be restored. I will always be here for this blessed writing My Son. It is the Logos word of God for you my Son. All is well, do not fear, cast all worries at my feet, rest in and with me, I handle all, you are My Son. Let the world go on for I have held you how to be here with Me. They will all want this peace but the only way to it is the way I have shown you in the extensive healing of your mind and the restoration of your life with Me Your Father, this is of paramount importance or I would not have you write out and bless others with these extensive writings. Your faith is being built stronger and stronger as you grow. Glory to my creation that is you, it is you that stand firm in my word, in my ways. Our relationship is going deeper and it will be the relationship of renown. I am so pleased and proud of you my man. You have only taken slightly for yourself as I have directed you to in your life. You must find yourself worthy of my calling on you and begin to love what I have created in you. If you only seek to love Jesus in you for now that is okay, I understand you are made in his and my image and so you are worthy of all the love of God and the world now. I will also press you to love the man you are and who I have created and how you are moving into the Spirit with me to help My children with Jesus and all of the things that I am teaching you. The heart you have In the love you extend out to those so brightly my Son, it does attract others to you. That is my evolving process for you. I will complete you Son, you will glow, look at yourself in the way you look to others when you minister the love of Christ to them. Direct the love to you, you do deserve It most fully. I am within you. I am your Holy Father.

4-20-99

By an act of your will you have purged from yourself the sadness and despair that have been In your life. All things are purged my child you are free. My Spirit is filling in healing all of the areas that need It. My will is for this to be done now My Son. I want nothing of the past in you for I create a new being in you. I love you My Son and I want you to be free as you are now. All things are with Me. When we work together great results happen. Do not allow to enter into your mind or your emotions any of these things that were purged and thrown out from you, refuse the darkness, it is a lie and you are free. I held you to a simplistic level for this time for my reasons Son. I do not want your healing and healed mind to move ahead too fast, even a little too fast.
Son you are so important to Me and yet I know the walk I have for you requires more of Me for you. I have not been absent from you but we have missed some of the healing time and social time we have needed to move ahead. Hey, never regret if time here is missed, I am always here for you and I know your heart is true unto Me, My Son. Look ahead to the wonderful times we will share and the true light you will be to my children. Your loving Father.

4-29-99

I have held you back my Son. Back from the many venues of your life that were robbing you of the joy of life you so needed. The body Soul and Spirit burnout that had settled on you now is almost restored back to you. I have guided all of these things in your life.

4-30-99

You are being too hard on yourself Son. Stop the thoughts by binding them and give them to Me and refill with a peace of resolve. You must trust in Me my Son. It is I who direct your words to write here as I promised you. I'm restoring and rebuilding you from the inside out as the lessons directed at you are showing you. You rushing Soul is crying out to be heard because it will not believe in Me and what you can do with it. I will change you because it Is My will to do so. You are also restricting Me and what I can and am doing In your life. I'm larger than large and I am directing you to these quiet times and places to restore you, refill you with what you need. I am rebuilding you in such a way for you to have new life. Do not fear, it will be completed, this will work my Son. It has been a battle for you to interpret you are already victorious, I am with you to watch over you. I'm writing with you to keep you comfortable and just to have you be here, I am directing you to be built up in just the ways I need to have you built. Be at peace and rest in me. I am your Father and I direct all things.

5-1-99

The things that trouble you are the things I'm working out with and through you. All things that you worry about our temporal, in fact they are very temporary in your life, it just seems or feels like they are dragging you down. The enemy tortures with time also nothing is exempt from the fangs.
You're calling from Me sets you apart from the world for now my Son. Like the butterfly that has to be reborn you have suffered through the stages of metamorphosis for the sake of what I have called you to. It is large and this is the amount of anointing and healing needed upon you. You just glowed for Me even when you do not feel It. The enemy does and tries relentlessly to defeat Me through you. It will not happen My Son, you are already too strong to fall. I had show you that yesterday. The modes you will walk in will be that happy and more. You are set aside for now although as we have explored, this is the sacrifice you make for Me. I hope that again I tell you to let the things of the world go for not if now forever. I will restore in my time now, and it will all work together for my plan and will on your special and unique life make you whole and complete. Do not compare to any others Son, no other has the walk you have that I have planned for you.
Your home life as a source of hardship for you, you must trust in the terms that I know how you are put together. I see what makes you truly happy and I am working behind the scenes to make It happen for you. Trust Me that I will not overburden you on this. The others that you look to before the attack upon you are as nothing, they are pawns used for effect and affect up on you for the actual rebuilding up of you. I am controlling all aspects of the situations you have held your grace my Son. Remember, not more than you can do, I move you ahead painlessly, slowly. You will not be overburdened, you will be blessed my Son. Yes, you are worthy of all of this attention in the supernatural realm, why not? Self-worth for my special Son is this world realm and also self-love for my Son also? I have had to re-create you while you were on the running mode of still living In your life. That is a tough job as you know that I have worked at it extensively my Son. I have set things aside for you to fill your desires. Son, be not afraid, you excel in our relationship and that Is, believe me, the greatest value of all the world. Except by will and I will direct you, I will help to fulfill all of my plans. My vow to you is remarkable results very soon now, watch me move for you, despondency out and desires of the heart in. I love you, your Father.

5-6-99

Be at peace my son, pursue peace when you find any opportunity and I will meet you at the place of peace. The world and the flesh wants to create stress and anxiety that you feel my precious child. I'm trying to move you from the worry of the world to the peace and the trust that is with Me. My child, the stress and related thoughts can rob you of the peace and strength and grace I have bestowed upon you and so you must try to seek peace away from the world whenever you can. I am strong and prevalent in your life and I will be watching over all the things you can become worried about. Worry not, my word states be anxious for nothing Son, trust in Me and I will use your life and see to your life and career. I'm healing you now and I am putting the weight of my love on you. My son I do love you so and I do cry when I see the suffering that you do go through. If there was a way I could have created it for you to come through this easier I know I would have made it so much easier for you. I know you will be stronger than steel and so wonderfully reliant on me your life will be blessed. I will along with you put all of these horrible times of long drawn-out healing under the blood and you will be free. You are correct perceiving and you have such a hard time accepting your own worthiness of this healing. This time is not just necessary in its healing ability it is so imperative, the enemy has to rob you of some of the great love, but I have kept a tight rein on him. It feels like a evil attack at times because I need to do so much and change so much in you to perfect my called and chosen Son to the level I have called you to. I do not worry that you have not done what you should have. I am most pleased with all you have done and all you have submitted yourself too with Me. Peace long with your submission to Me is your obedience to me and that has been almost total. That is in itself a wonderful blessing to me with my creative ability for you to come to Me. It is through the action of submission and obedience that I'm able to work in my children's lives again. I will say I am sorry that these times have been so harsh on your life and severe on your Soul. That is my way of doing things and times as you trade a quickening of the healing did that to the severity you endured. You are growing in grace and health my Son, you are better and you will be better still more and more each day as you have been. I see all and all of the improvements in you and I will not let the enemy rob you of any we have addressed. Seek the peace you so richly need and deserve My Son I am here with you always, always. I'm watching it closely, closely. I am moving you through these times with my grace and at my peace. Look not to your own logic about time, I control time, more than anything in this world. Give to yourself my Son, you have gone through the hard roads of life in a very strong way and a weary way that others know not, you do deserve more and you do deserve worth and rest. Bless you My Son.

5-17-99

To my one who stays by me. Son, I heal my children In My way with My power in their lives. You my Son do have many things done your way and want to convince me to do them in that way. That way may seem correct to you but it would not be. Your flesh is what has been crying out to me and I want you to now see that along with helping you to see what is happening in your life that I am directing. This is still very severe healing and changing around in your life, I write with you ]My Son for this reason, it is life threatening and life-changing for you to go through this. You are discouraged by yourself and the expectations you put up on yourself. Look to the ease of writing with me and the measure executed and help to exercise when we come you as this. I do not do this writing with just anyone, this time of closeness is a gift from the Creator. A cherished event that I give to you that I know you need. My hurting child turn away, hush now and ask for your Spirit to move forth, you will see, I am guiding things that you cannot even see. Good healing takes time my Son and I do not want you hurt again, I have called you out of life as you knew it to be here with Me so I could teach and heal you. There was a lot more healing than I did not tell you about because you would ever dealt against the time needed to finish, not knowing everything increased your faith walk. You have not extended the time of the healing and learning out in any way that causes you to be at fault. It is only according to my will that you are here and according to your obedience to Me. I will reward you for this time as I have promised to. The things in your life will all become as finished for you. I'm watching all things for you my Son. You are within my will for your life and so do not beat yourself up with the inadequate feelings you are troubled by, I will extol you when the time is right. My Son, you have learned wonderfully well from all of the sources I have provided for you, I'm here for you and I watch you so closely throughout your day but especially here in quiet time with Me. I hear all of your words my Son, I am giving you great things, do not fight, the Spirit of God in you with the flesh feelings. It is to be a rest time for you, do not fear it or avert, my will is my call upon you and I see your heart. You are mine, and I love you so, I will not leave you, you were called by Me to fulfill, I will. Seek me and I will do more and more as you are My Creation. I want you at peace with Me and whole, in all aspects with you. Do not forget, it will all come to pass My son. I will not let you down, your time now in this temporary situation in the suffering is for continued compassion learning, I will set you free soon now Son, My Son who is whole again. I'm sorry life at times hurts, I will deliver unto you a complete life. I am here you always. Your Father.

5-20-99

Be at peace my Son, I am delivering you from the things that you have found so distasteful as you have been healing. Do not worry as you had been about all of the desires of your heart being met. I will meet them all with you and for you.
The things of burden that you were carrying with you were indeed heavy for you My Son. I am sorry that you carried them for that extended time but I needed you to see how much they could hold you down. They were burdens that your flesh felt Important to bare, I want you to continue yes, continue to give the burdens of the world to me each day. My Son, I want your burden to be light and I promise you I will deal the very best way I can with each vision I give to you.
The waiting you had to endure has been difficult for your flesh to endure, but your strength has been built wonderfully well My Son. Be with Me my love, and we will move on to higher levels with each other. I know you are still tired and you do need to rest yet, but I will deliver you out of all of the things you held and that held you. I'm so proud of you and the strides you make each day both for you and for our Kingdom. I'm so close with you Son, I am so happy I could create in you the clean heart you are growing so well with. I heal all of the innermost things you need to be healed from throughout your day.

5-25-99

First My Son welcome here to sort some things out with Me your heavenly Father. Hold fast to truth my child as truth is what I write with you. Hold fast then to the great grace you have in Me, I have given you the gift of faith yes, but the faith you have cultivated is a large portion. You do just as my word states my Son, you enter into my presence with praise and thanksgiving as you seek my face. I will not let you down my Son, for I know how much you need Me each day. Be at ease that what needs to be accomplished today, all will be done according to My will, I am watching you now very closely my Son.
You are not at fault for the feelings you have still in the early mornings. I know they are horrible for you and a nasty way to start your day. You are a small amount responsible for the feelings only because you are accustomed to that pattern of worry and anxiety from before in your life. It is a very hard habit to break and reformulate My Son, as your healing time draws to a close the thoughts that harass and hurt your mind will be stopped. That is my promise to you, my vow to you, you will not go on like this My Son. Some things change slowly but they do change, please share all your prayers with me and all of your thoughts and feelings, I want to hear them and they help you to express them. There are no regrets for you from your mind thinking that you do not spend enough time here with Me, Son that is the past and my days are each new, that is why I do it that way. Second, it creates anxiety and worry and we are removing that from your life now, I do not want you to take on any burden my Son, my yoke is light and you must remain light in your thoughts of the world and of your call. I want to show you these things my Son.

One you are set apart for my use
you are being trained my me form our use In our kingdom
all of the things your heart desires will be fulfilled
the flesh is hard to hold back and kill
you have the right to the time
I will recompense you all the time that was lost or forgone
the trials are real, actions taken for growth
the enemy is relentless in pursuit of you
your power is more than you ever imagine but you will know It
within your logic of what you have insured you will understand
others influence over your life is nothing for you to fear
I will never leave
I will restore, my vow and promise
you will never be disappointed by what I have for you
there are a few for you to compare to
your anointing and our relationship will only increase
I love you so
your Angels are always there at your side helping
I watch over all those you love very closely
you are my son in whom I am well pleased
your footsteps are directed by me
you have learned vast amounts of supernatural knowledge
all of the verses in my word are true and for you to use, more to come
there will be exciting times to come, believe me
all is well
you are with God

I have called to you Son, and as my word states many are called and few are chosen. My Son, you answered my call on your life and I have chosen you. You are heartfelt and sincere to me. I see your heart and know you seek truth and light with Me. You are very brave, I said very brave and strong to turn away from the world and the flesh and all the aspects of it as you do. Son, I bless you for that, when you put off the world for my sake you grow closer to me by bounds and leaps. Have faith and belief and that it is the better choice, all things in your situation of healing and learning will grow together and you will see I know all and use each thing for your benefit. You will be free, I will change your life and the letters around in the word. Do not fear to be free my little Son, you have a very big walk in these past three years since the Lord Jesus called to you. Do not even feel a little bit bad about the things I told you to do. The important ones you have for told about my Son Yeshua and the other things of Heaven that you have spoke of meant much to them. I have watched and looked over each thing and scrutinized each thing for you my Child. Do you not think that I am not thrilled that you answered My calls so willingly? I am. I see how much you have submitted to Me my Son, I am most pleased. You are the light In this darkened world, I have had to do major, major work upon you with regards to reformulating you to the image of Christ. Your call is not small My Son, and blessed is My Son who has had a large enough heart to endure all of the changes In his life as you have had. It is my will that your mind and emotions and body be reformulated as we have done. My responsibility Son, not your flesh, My plans now, and your submission, you have endured the pain of the changed body, Soul and Spirit. All things my Son will work together for you. No time has been wasted, no feelings have been changed in vain. You my Son are nowhere near the person you were when we started. You have learned so much from Holy Spirit and from the teaching I have provided for you. Your experience and the way you have taught yourself using your heart to help others as pleased Me so much. My call upon you is real, your necessary healing is real, all of the visions of the supernatural are real, all of our writing is in fact truth. No one but you can fill the shoes and plans I have established for you. It is a real ministry of my Son, I know you will be pleased with your heart's desire. I have known you, I control so much My Son, trust in Me and watch for my movement.
I am the God of restoration my Son. The things that are seen to in your life as having been taken from you must be restored to you. I say must be restored because you own them or did own feelings and actions that made up your life. As I have written to you before Son I have taken motivation from you and desire from you to slow you down so that you could de-confuse and be at a resting state so that you could heal. When you worry about things in your life it robs you of that healing peace. I also know you need the strongest lesson in self-worth. You need a lesson so much in strength in value of yourself so that you believe you are worth being healed and restored. My heart goes out to you My Son, I have set you aside for this time, long time, if you wish to say so that your value would be established. I want you for My work for the kingdom of God. There is no higher call. And within that call on your life I have shown you it is a large calling and you are anointed largely from a purpose. Varying agrees of people My Son, all my children. Look to the Lives as variable one to another, I make it all work out fair in the end, that is balanced to you. Set your mind at ease that the things you are feeling and thinking of are all within my world for you for now in this time of your life. Let go and let me be in control and responsible for you my Son. It will make life so much easier and it is my plan for you. The time will come when others will plead for my voice so that they can have the peace you know of. My Son I will never leave you and the strength of the relationship we have established that we continue will grow and will be the Pearl of great price. You have made the sacrifice to me to be reformed and your happiness is what I want for you and will now be visited upon you more and more. You are learning from Me more and more as we grow closer to it my beauty. It has been a pearl of great costs for you to pursue the Pearl of great price now that you have seen the truth and the lie. You know the way to the Father my Child, you will share that with others along with your many other talents. I will restore you Son, all of those innermost things you crave, I am not torturing you with My time of restoration Son. Good things of great value take time, you are of that great value, you are of that great time, you are of My great time to given to you. As the Pearl of great price and value was constructed layer upon layer, of growth upon growth, over an impurity you are growing into a luminescent quality My Son. I love you right where you are at my faithful one. You will grow and prosper in my guidance. No mistakes for you and affirmed for direction, look to Me and I will always direct things around you. You must rest still however and understand you are within My will and plan. Allow yourself to be led by Me. I will guide you to total fulfillment, ask for your faith and by the will and plan of God. It is in the works and the will to come to fruition. You my child will be the fruit in fruition to come to Me my little Child. Trust in me and I will bless Thee. Your loving Father.

5-31-99

My Son the miracles you desire are being delivered upon you as we write these words. My Son, you are receptive to my words in a wonderful way and that helps you to hear Me so clearly. Son, do not look at your fleshly feelings to notice the change within you. Your emotions will be better and your feelings will change as a consequence of the miracle healing upon your Spirit and Soul. You will Improve now most diligently. I will hopefully hear heart's desire Son. Do not fear, you will have to do nothing to accomplish, that is, It is My will for you to trust Me, and believe in what I can do for you My Son.
Isaiah was of love and was for you, inspired by me for you, you know I use my word to inspire my servants. You are my most worthy one of this, even though your faith has been stretched very far.

6-4-99

To be alone with me continuing the needs of relationship is my will. Have this timeframe in your life. Do not be judgmental upon yourself for time taken, there are many times other things will need to be done to and need to be attended to. I want rather, for you to relax and enjoy the refreshing times here with me and look to the strides that we have made towards your healing time my Son. The things that trouble you are from the time extent taken to restore you to the fullness you enjoyed in the past, I can say to you My Son the times have changed and you have changed. I want you to be re-created and rested from the battles that you have endured.

6-20-99

Your fears must be banished from you I am most happy to be here with you healing you and closer than at other times of your life. It is perfectly natural to do this with the your Heavenly Father, I have planned this time for you to be here with me as I restructure you in a new way for a new life with Me. You do have questions, they are over the length of time this has taken but you are on my timeframe remember Son? You are frustrated about My teaching times for you also, these are lessons of divine appointed time My Son, I am showing you that I am always there for you. I am working behind and walking behind the scenes to bring things to pass that will fulfill your heart's desire. I do have an important plan for your life and It is My will to ease all of you into it so that you will have more of the joy and happiness that you so desire. You do not like this kind of preparation it takes to get you ready for the type of life I have for you. Each thought, each trial has been for a reason. I am moving as quickly as I can to bring you to the fullness that you will need to work correctly in your life. The new life that We will be together in. You are doing so well with what I have asked of you, to not be confounded by the flesh in the world. I have my hand upon all the things you worry about and my promise to you is that I will never give you more than you can bear and that I will not subject you to trials when you can't tolerate them. You must still believe in your living is nice and you are worthy to hear from Me. Yes you are. How do you think the Bible was written? It is the inspired Word of God to the children in written form. This was the best way also to commune with you My Son. You had to go through so many meaningful trials and healing to get you to where you are now I knew you needed more than a spoken prophetic word here and there in your life. I come to My children according to their need my Son. Your need is great and your heart is true and pure, I know you My Son and I know just what you are. I want you very happy with yourself as a creation and as My called One. Your need was there and so Son I am there, here am I always for you. You cannot argue with the written words, they are too true and too much of you. It may be looked at as a gift My Son but you are worthy of the special gift that this is. Very few of my children write my prophetic word just as very few of my children speak out when in rarer My words to others as you have experienced. Do you see how close I choose to be to you? It is a need regulated by Gods speed. I do enjoy this time here with you so much also. Others may bark about this situation but you have Gods spark.

Pray larger than you have, testing and that is wonderful
Let yourself rest and move into my plans for you
Do not worry her concern yourself of things you can do for you
You give It all to me, let me do it all for you
Imagine and envision more of what you want, and how
you can become the vision.
I will guide you through everything
Silence is acceptance
You will hear more and more from me as we grow in this relationship
Make up lists of your wants and how I can provide them for you
You have done nothing, wrong please be guilt free
Your Father in heaven loves you to your hearts content and mine.

6-30- 1999

Be at peace My Son and I am taking the emotions and feelings you have been dealing with away from you right now as you ask me in your prayer. Do not be self-conscious but be Spirit conscious of what you need from Me. You can feel the smoothness of my grace upon you as you relinquish more of yourself to Me. I have promised to My Son that I would give you strength and that I would restore all the things taken from you. Am I not the Father of my word? All of the faith and belief you have within you points to that. I will restore you My Son. You are my best work Son. It has gone on and on for you to be free from the mindsets you have a had in the past. It has gone on and on to rebuild while keeping you active in life as we have done. I am so proud of what you have done and I rejoice in the obedience that has brought you to Me. I will not let you down. I am healing more and more of you here but I am restoring things to your emotional state also. I bend you to feel tired because I have caused you to be tired to force you into quiet times of rest. You do not notice the changes in you from day to day out of this frustration healing but I must call you to believe that they are most important. I am showing you that in the mind of you my Son this very very important. I am showing you that you must take the time to renew your self with me for it Is God directed and God ordered. You were totally fried my Son, no room for any more things In your life. You were burned out and at absolute ends.. I wanted to call you before in your life like you were quote doing it your way unquote remember? It was never my afterthought or might as well call you now that you have gotten your self into such a mass as you have thought before. You my Son have been touched by Me because I have directed you in all things to bring you to Me, yes, Me God, Your Father. I know you are enormous in heart and the grace and love you carry for others within you. I knew you before you were born My Son. I have said it here so many times before to you in these writings to you. There have been no accidents. You were so in the trenches as you've learned to walk in faith. I am your strength and you were an open vessel for Me to flow through. Son, that is one of the most Important things that you can be in this world is an open vessel. Open to My Spirit, and open to My voice. I say again you are within My will and my plan. You are not doing things wrong, you are not wasting away. You are growing slowly in the ways, My little Child In the way that I am preparing you for ministry in your life. You do not need to feel inadequate in the flesh. Crucify the flesh My Son and see the strength of the Spirit now within You. I want you to live In the grace that only I can give. It is a gift for you and I will never ever diminish or remove It from you. My grace upon you my Son will cause you to go from situation to situation without guilt, fear, or anxiety of any kind. Do not look at the problem, look at Yeshua, what would he do? He would know that I am taking care of everything, just everything! Do not be hard on yourself, it takes time to un-learn the world's habit of worry and anxiety. I will break the habits with you and I will give you strength and grace to overcome the world and all the tasks that await you. That again is my promise to you. You have fought off the evil one with Me and it has left you in need of this healing time, but I am always utilizing my servants and their walks with Me. It has been very hard for you to endure but I have taught you the lessons others have needed. These take lifetimes to learn with Me and you now have the compassion to understand all of the power and anointing to come against all I have planned for you. You see My Son about all and the learning while in battle parts of that aspect of your life is over. Never again will you have to face with such a concentration of evil at one time in your life again. To be set aside as you have been to heal from your flesh life and then from the battle scars was hard for you to endure, and the enemy was still attacking you through all, every possible area. You know who you are in Me and now you are free. We are digging things out of you from your recent past so they can be let go. They are feelings of bitterness and flesh thoughts put upon a Spirit man. Try to abide In Me my growing child and I will lift you up to the areas that you will be at peace in. Laugh at the world My Son, much of the foolishness that you experience will delight you now that you will be feeling so much better. Be strong in My call child, you have developed into just what I had wanted, you have waited for Me to heal you and I best for you that I will guide you in all the things that you need to do. Know I haven't guided you into all things quote to do unquote yet because It is not time as yet my Son. All things need to be as for now to remain calm for you. Yes I do this for you. I do make you tired and do keep you uninterested In the projects because I needed you rested and quiet. The time for this is now drawing to a close but know that I feel anguish My will is what you need to pray for. My plan Is what you want. That is what we are going to be doing. It may feel unconventional now My Son but believe in Me the conventions of this world will soon be overthrown by my spirit upon my people. You My child will be at the forefront of this new changed world. You have been obedient to Me and I will reward all and bless you with the desires of your heart. It will all come together soon now My Son. I have not left you, I have done just what is right for you. You will be pleased and last long. These things you feel are real, and yet you are getting used to My touch upon your life. I do a new thing with my Son of my Spirit now today and watch the next few days. I am here with you, be with Me in proper ways and in prayer as you pray large and I will act upon each of your requests to Me. You see you mean a lot to Me in this Kingdom My Son. I have you where I want you so believe in Me and we will amaze all with the kingdom of God. Beautiful you are my Son I am your Father.

7-15- 99

I do inspire you as I talk to you each day and each way. I guide you my Son and more and more things each day also. Cast your worries of things perceived as problems at my feet my child. You are forgiven for all of your sins, you are free of the strongholds that had held you, you are a righteous oak growing stronger each day my Son. It is I who am so happy with you, and my promise is that you will be happy with yourself soon also Son. You are better and you are learning this lesson more each day.

7-24-99

I am guiding you through all the troubles that have harassed you in this life. I am watching out for you in all that you do. I will provide for all of the things you need. I do not need to make examples for you because I have fed all of the needs of your life. It is hard when you worry and do not give it all to Me. I will still take it all from you. I will take all the worries from you. I will grant your prayer requests and I will quicken My will to have this arrive for you.
My Son's strong Spirit Man is the one that you have been given to endure the healing and torturous times that I have placed you in. I am the responsible one and so therefore I will expand your rewards here on earth and in Heaven. You obediently have followed my guidance for this time I have set you apart in. I am utilizing all of this time to heal, strengthen and teach you a great amount of things. Hold to my promises to you. I will deliver them to you my Son. That is my word and you know I must keep my word.
We are closer each day, there is great progress made each day my child I am watching all that is new and I will deliver you from every, every problem. Trust in Me and give to Me and I will work for your happiness. I am now. I will reward.

7-27-99

We are on a walk my Son, not a run but a slowly changing, healing relationship walk. Your thought processes are being changed, your time frames are being changed, your values are being changed. Be careful with yourself as these changes are being implemented in your life.
Look away from the world yet my child, I am still guiding things around you as I will always but I am making way for the new you. You must have faith and believe that all things will work out not only for the good but for your good. You are very important to me My Son. You have not gone through all of these changes either in vain or for no reason. I tell you the truth, soon you will see this sudden difference when I release you, the projects will be completed one after another quickly my child. Your home and your life will be restored in a new and fresh way that will delight you. I have changed values in your life as I had told you - you will look at things differently now from the time of healing. You have not been out of my will for your life at all. I will show you clearly the way to call my Son. I will not let you fall. The burdens that I place upon you will be what you can handle conservatively. I am restoring you slowly. When your energy is released by Me into your life with all other things you will again feel "at home" in your life and the "comfort" will return for your life change will be underway. I rejoice in what you are doing. My Son all is my plan. All will complete in proper time.

7-28-99

I do delight when you are here with me. It is the alone time that is healing. Others can help you to heal, but I alone know what you most need. I am not only here with you now, but I am with you throughout your day. I will guide you to completion of all the things you desire. My promises have not only come from the writings we have done but also now so prophetically spoken by someone else. I inspire all of my children and those words were overdue. The veil of tears you have experienced in your life will soon be through. I am still working through your dreams and I am still repairing the words and burned-out areas of your mind each day. Your feelings and thoughts are being dealt with now as we improve you to completeness with glory. My heart will win you over my Son. Your heart is given over to me more and more. You are so loved by me my Son! I have set you apart, apart to be in this time healed and my will, will be done. I will redeem this time. I will change your mind, I will deliver you. Walk with me to completeness, and ask for faith increase and grace to go beyond. You have come here faithfully day to day and I will continue to Bless. Father

8-2-99

I am watching and doing all things for you. Cast off any feelings of inadequacy that you have and I will give you peace. And you are becoming more supernaturally normal as you grow in Me, seek my face and seek Me my child and I will empower and correct and heal you each time that you do. Your walk is much more than I have called others to and you have endured the hardship along the ways. The building of the new is what I will do exclusively now My Son. You have learned, you have grown, you have turned from yourself to be with Me and my will for you in this quick life. It is quick to My standards, it is training time to My standards. My Son, each of your perceptions of what I am are true. One, you are so close to Me you perceive in truth, and that is a great accomplishment. Second, you are being rebuilt by Me so we will relate even more. You have put your flesh aside for Me to have My will be done in your life. My Son, no greater gift can I receive than this. I will bless you with more and more.
Bind the frustration from your home life and by doing so many things that you will understand and through you, you will have revelation and I know what is best. It is I that want to give you all the desires of your heart and I will see to the fact that they all will be fulfilled. I understand you and I will work with the smallest frustration to the largest project. My perfect world will be done My Son. It is for God's purpose you wait, my purpose is true and good, in fact it is perfect. Know why the low imperfect things for a time do develop for the better life. The most heartfelt sorrow and most well deserved things I see to each day in your life. I love you My son, I know the result, it was Me. Your Father.

8-10-99

My Son, I have been with you throughout your thoughts, words and deeds for these times in your flesh and faith life upon the earth. You are most assuredly my responded Son of My call upon you. You have been most obedient to Me and I reward that in this life and your next also. My sweet child, you have not failed Me In any consequential ways. You are so willing to please Me your Heavenly Father that our relationship has progressed so far. I will never leave you, the things we do and feel will be with you for ever and more then you have experienced as this world draws to a close. Be not in fear for anything My Son, I will always guide you and hold you. The different walks by children take are according to their still in-tact wills and the world's influence. You My Son are turning away from the world as I have trained you to do to seek My face more and more. Do I not reward those who love Me? Do I not come closer to those who need Me more? Your need for Me was and still is great, it is part of my plan since before you were born. I have known you, just you, and what you could be in this world. It has been frustrating for you to have used up so much time as you perceive it to be healed from the woes of the flesh but My Son, they were very severe. I put you into the fire of trial as you were healing because I knew you were strong. I know you inside and out My Son. I know how frustrated you are with life right now but I also know it has to be worked out through my grace. You have not been working in much of the sense that you feel worthy but the work was being done in you that for this time of your life is, I say is more important for you. Find the thoughts of inadequacy and worthlessness you feel and give them to Me. First of all, Christ Jesus is In you and you can no longer be unworthy of what I call you to do. Further, you are more than a conqueror and therefore more than adequate. I cover the bad feelings that the enemy would use others for to hurt you. I won't stand for My Son to be brought down. Now it may be that you are set apart and aside for a time to protect you as my will states, but then We grew closer in our walk. You see, you have not lost anything My child. I will provide for you all that you need. Yes, the God and Creator of all you are and do is talking to you. I desired this for all of my children and soon we will be together, all those who believe and confess me as their Lord.
Do not fear the continued thoughts of your flesh of Bible reading and typing and metabolism. My child I watch all of the avenues of your life, I will lead you clearly of each one to do. Your need of Me is there most clearly and so likewise I will be there for you. You have learned the lessons of waiting on Me and I will deliver and heal you in all areas. When you put away the desires of the flesh and the worldly ways you are blessed by Me and trained in the ways of the Kingdom of God. That is so very important for you to understand that you are storing up treasures for you and for your family with Me by being obedient to Me now. It is not a punishment by Me for you, it is a setting aside of value for the latter prize with Me. I am your Father, I know how to set pleasures aside for my Son in heaven. Know that all the perceptions that you have a hand in all the things you have experienced a real My Son, they are revealed things to you as I promised you. You will be able to utilize all that I have shown you. You are not stepped away, you have grown closer to Me, your petitions have all been heard, trust in Me and I will uphold, you can be filled with My knowledge.
I will use you My Son to do great things, I have directed your steps and I will do so again and again. Do not fear, you will not destroy, I allowed the time to move by you in peace My Son. I will bring together all of the things needed in there time, My perfect time and all will be well. You will be greatly rewarded for all of the things necessary restructuring healing time My Son. I vow to you, within the parameters of time that I have revealed to you through others. Watch the work and do the things through your body, Soul and Spirit that will make you complete again. I love you so much, watch now for My touch. I love you Father.

8-14-99

My dear Child, I have plans for you. Plans long more elaborate than you will give yourself credit for being able to fulfill for me. I know you are able and I know how to reform you so that you will be able to move into the plans I have for you. I made plans for you before you were born yes, but I have changed and change them as you have progressed towards the goals I have for you. I have pushed you and guided you into a time of your life that was a true test of your will and mine. My child, you have held back none of the things I have asked you to do. My child, you have set yourself apart as I have called you to do. You have endured the changes I have been listing In your life and waited on your Lord to move to heal you. You have slowed your life down to a crawl so that you could be safe within my care. As a small child has to start small and crawl first you have also had your life reduced to this level. I would not have done this with you if It wasn't absolutely necessary. My Son you are starting over. It is a new beginning for My Son and you will be joyful about it. My vow to you, and your joy will grow and grow as you grow more each day. To not be discouraged or at fault is My sovereign move upon your life My Son. I want you refined and rebuilt and grown up again for my glory. I bring you to brokenness so that the new life in Christ Jesus will be all the more glorious. I am with you for all of these times and even if It does not seem like I am that close I am My child. That is the flesh talking, know that I only want you fulfilled and complete. Your Father.

8-16-99

I am here with you and I am inspiring you to write the comforting words that will heal you. This is valid restoration time and I will always bless you with these types of times. I have told you of It before and I remind you of it again, My Son I bless you with special things like this because you are special. The amounts of kisses and words are proportionate to My will and you My Son have a generous proportion of passion for your God. Your anointing is vast and powerful, your gifts of the Holy Spirit moved you to levels of revelation that please you. My Son, I uphold you with all of these gifts because you are worthy of them. You are worthy, the world in you would want to compare to others the level of gifts and the enemy would try to work you into thinking you are not worthy of any of them. Those are both untruths, I bestow gifts according to my grace and knowledge and style. We see them now Son and I confirmed to you that you are worthy and whole. Good job, My Son! Stand on my promises, much will come, do not give into the flesh or the enemy.
My promise to you was for a new life My Son, well you may forget my promises but I do not. You called to Me from your heart for the new life I could offer. Now it is coming to pass My child. It has taken time yes My child because I did many things during the waiting time. Your body cried out to be delivered from medicine, I heard it and moved to take it away from you. It also involved your will and your emotions and your thoughts. My Son the effects of those poisons are now gone from you and your thoughts are returning to where we need them to be. You have been valiant in your strength to endure all that you need to do to be set free from the spirit of death and the spirit of darkness. I strengthen your mind now with new thoughts and Ideas. All the other things of this world do not matter so much as you and the things I have you hand over to Me to do with Me. It has taken a lot of time yes, but I'm with you and now you know Me so well. I am part of you, My plan, I am not distant, I am more involved into you. Others will search for this, I am here with you, but in you. I depend on the receptivity of My children. You My Son are receptive, you are receptive to Me, and it does wonderful things in the faith walk for you to come closer and to understand the things to be "like" Me. Do not let that worry you, are not My children to be ding the things of God? That would mean that they would mean that they would need to be like me and all that they do, this is a deep thing My Child. Your emotions will be restored My Son and your joy will be manifested to the fullest. I will fulfill My promise to you of restoration, of your energy, and motivation, creativity and desire by the end of the summer. Yes that Is My will and nothing will stop this My Beloved. You have been obedient to me My Son and I will fill the desires of your heart. Not just those you will see, others will also see the new man of God that I have seen here in the Heavens. You are here happy to Me and joyful, loving and contented My Son, and I will now manifest it to you in the world in which you reside for now. I have plans for you that will blow your mind, of building you up for the Kingdom of Heaven. I have prepared all this for you. I call you to the Holiness I know you can achieve and all things will just fall into place for you My Son. Blessed is he that seeks My face, Blessed is he who is under my grace, blessed as you My Child of Light, I bless you throughout the day and night. Your loving Father.

8-27-99

As you watch I'm fulfilling the things I have promised to you. I will reintroduce the thoughts and feelings slowly according to your standards but they will come to you nonetheless that you and your dreams have wanted. Allow yourself to just be with me and I will restore you according to your heart and my will. Your Father.
I'm caring for all the aspects of your life. That is one of the reasons it is taken so long to conform you to the Image that I need you to be, your flesh would cry out at times and I would let up for the reconstructing for a time. I never want you to push Me away from you and go on yourself. As you know, you have told me at times to just leave, my child I have known that is only your flesh rising up for a time in your heart then calling out to Me again. I do maintain the changing and refining process even when you do not feel I am working on you. You have been a large work for Me to complete. I have accepted your will to exchange for My perfect will so that I could then complete the desires of your heart. My Son, there was so much to change in you, I could not do it quickly, it would have been so much of the shock and I couldn't just do things that way. The enemy would have harassed you so much for my favoritism and you would not be as strong as you are now. The things are changed and you are new My Son, but they are effective for giving up of yourself as you have for the good of the body. That is a large price to pay, larger than others have even usually realized that believe in Me, I realize. I know all of the times you have cried to Me in pain, I know all of the times you have cried of the things to do because you were just too tired because I had taken your energy to keep you calm, I have watched as you have watched life go on as you waited on me. I have heard your innermost thoughts over and over and you made the sacrifice to do My will and watched others advance. That is the testing of your iron My Son and you have won! My delight is with you, My blessing is for you! My plans were working quietly behind the scenes as you were waiting for Me to move. Now you see how I have moved, the plans and directions I have shown to you are My perfect will, there is your written prophecy you asked for, Bible instruction as my will leads, teaching as my will leads, rely upon previous talents that I given you. These are all in my plan, all in my purpose for you. Stay close to Me Son and wonders things will come to pass. I will astound even you my quiet so far child. We are still so close you see My son, I have made many promises to you and I will stand by each one and now do them as I declare more to you. And the visions you have wanted will be delivered to you as a gift. The weight that you struggle with will now be ordered by Me. The feelings and the situations from your home life and the other things you struggle with that you have been craving will be brought to you. My son you have faithfully come to Me for your needs and as My childlike delight in what you have grown into. I will anoint you more and more as these gifts are delivered on to you. Be not afraid you are set aside for Me, I have ordered your steps, I love you so deeply, I must deliver to you your self-love, read and reflected on this. I am here and others will be a surprise to you as well. It is so My son. Your father.

8-28-99

Hey my son you are back believing in me again. Rejoice in Me I'm here with you. The flesh is under subjection to the Spirit of you my son. It is a lighter place to be, you will grow in this walk my Son, in such a profound way there is no way for you to turn back. I will guide you and I will uphold you. I will say to you I will truly “look out ” for you in all ways. Old and new blockages are torn down and away from you as the Spirit of praise and rejoicing comes to you.
You are growing my Son, everyday as you feel you are just struggling you are in fight growing and you are regrowing your mind as well. Yes I did lead you to the further revelation of prescription drugs that were given to you in the fact that they didn't actually effect your subconscious mind. They ravaged you and that is what is being restored in time. Hold onto Me each day and do as I lead, your walk will be a upright and completeness will see speed. My love, always be close, I delight in your fresh heart of true trust. Faith builds your house and love rebuilds your Soul. You are an ever-increasing circle of Christ.

8-30-99

You are mine and I am so happy you have chosen me. Your life my Son is filled with choices, with your free will given over to Me I can move in your choices to help you grow. I provide you with other choices also though to teach you the correct choices to make. I bless the ones you then make to bring you closer to Me. Do you know now how close we are? I care about the most insignificant item to you so I can show you I am there, I watch every thought you have and then soothe you if they become confused or troubling to you. I watch over my Son to heal and restore you so very carefully to the fullest of life you have the inheritance for. You were growing, growing into just who I need you to be so that I can bestow great things upon you. The plans ahead for you my Son are for doing great things in the body of Christ. No small plan do I have for one as obedient as you. There are larger and larger things that will need to be done for the kingdom of God and the place you have in them as being planned by Me for fulfillment. It is a large place my Son. I would not have called you so strongly if I did not know who and what you could become. The choices you have made have brought you closer to just what my plans are for you. though you feel confused and unworthy still my Son I your heavenly Father see the reality, I see the truth, I'm working on all aspects of you, I am covering all the bases you are becoming aware of. Let them go, I delight in helping you, I delight in taking the burden of the stress from you so that you can live more freely. It is very hard to do but you learn some of it each day. You have authority over you in Yeshua's name. That is to become more Yeshua like the authority exercised with the strength of the one who lives in you, namely Yeshua in you. Claim that strength as positive moves come into your life and you choose them. Give yourself to Me and I direct your paths with my perfect will and the strength of Yeshua in you.

9-4-99
Colossians 3-16 and 17

I have put you in peace my Son as we continue through all of the walks I have arranged for you. I guide and provide for you each way that brings you peace and healing. Do not fear any of the thoughts or any ideas you have, I am directing those also. As you see you are not doing anything wrong because you choose to be this close to Me. Seek Me as you do and I will bless you with health and freedom from the worry and woe that had harassed you. It is being broken from your thoughts each day. Stay close to your loving Father in prayer and practice and you will be so very free. Your relationships at home will also be free.
I have shared so many things with you my Son, things of the kingdom, but also things of blackness of this world you live in. I have not given you more than you can bear but there is an aspect of unbelieveability you hold on to and worry about. I do not deceive and I have had control over you in these teaching times, hold to all of the things as fact unless I tell you specifically that It was your flesh. I want to reduce your doubt and increase your faith by reinforcing these things to you. My word states “things I reveal to you”. I want to tell you more and more of the truths of life and Spirit my Son. You are much more able now to understand my precepts as you are now much more healed. I am sorry life had worked harshly against you but the things I have now for you are for greatness and true fulfillment my child. I watch over my children closely and you will know Me and hear Me more and more. It is my will for you my loved one, here always you are with Me and I love you so your father.

9-6-99

You will not receive a spirit of pride, but I will rather build you up in the manner of which I would have you built up.
I took more time to bring you to this time and this teaching my child. I did hold back at times from the intensity for gentleness and allowing things to work out themselves even part for you my Son. I do not push when the life force will move you into position to receive my glory at the best time. I'm holding you and directing all of the things around you, not just a few, all of them as I rebuild you. I have kept you separate from much of the world, why? The people of the world were the ones that continued the hurt that was being removed from you. I have made no mistakes, I have provided your healing and teaching my Son. The past of hurts are under the blood of Yeshua and delivered out of your soul and body. Claim the ever redeeming power of the blood of Yeshua. Fear nothing! I am giving you more authority all of the time and restoring, yes rebuilding, every inch of you afresh and new, brand new! You will not be confounded by the world, and the Influences and trickery you will conquer In vast ways. It will be the closer walk that you desire in your heart that will have you existing with Me. Your sacrifice of your flesh lusts and the time and effort you have taken for yourself to heal is your obedience of my call upon your life.
I did call you legs and, and I did call you just in time, and I did look at your heart and how large and how hurt it had been. I have to use children for large places that have been healed from her for it creates compassion for others, experience and compassion. A battered hand best helps another up. This is my phrase, but it is wisdom and it is within you my son. All I have is already within you. Enjoy the thoughts of grandeur and ideas of power. It is all waiting for you to realize and discover. You are a special person, you have been singled out by We for rebuilding and a plan that Is big that I have not yet shown you. That is a faith walk and a building up In the Lord walk. Now I will instruct you in my word for a time my Son, but also I will build up other areas of your heart and Soul that also were injured. I do not draw this close to all my children. It is Me and you must cast out all the doubt and pull off the flush membrane. Trust in Me and my call upon your life, I have called thee in righteousness and written it to you in addition to my Word. You are blessed by Me and I hold you close, closer than others yes, jealousy abounds, but close for the need of the child and the direction of the walk I need for you. It is me, I am here, I am close, I am decided on you my Son, you are my child of fulfillment. Your father

9-8-99

My Son that is who you truly are. By my calling to you and you responding to Me and giving what you were to Me I can form you into the better thing my creation can be in this world. You are hurting now and I will move to heal that now. You are hurting from fear and past ironies that continue to trouble you. Believe in what I can do, now bind the feelings from your “heart” this time and your mind…there was pain there, it was real. I am the counselor and the healer my child, you are seeking Me and what I can do for you and as you open up that beam of light to me the darkness tries to resist you. Bind the enemy now. You have done well to come against the strong opposition but it is my strength that will hold within you. I may be foreshortened from your feelings wise now but in your Spirit I am there. I will not be absent from your feelings soon now this lighter trial is almost over. The issues of pain you feel will be dealt with my son. Hold to me and I vow that most soon all will be well. Your father.

9-13-99

I bless you with your heart's desire and my guidance for you in this world. I have called to you and directed you into the position of school because your heart wants it. I have talked to you more and more because our relationship grows more all the time. I have called to you out of the need of the body for someone just like you with a heart that has been so compassionate and healed as thoroughly as you are being healed My Son. Do not fear the closeness of us or the blessing that I have bestowed upon you, it Is real and it is for the building up of you. The scriptures that I bring to you along with the environment that I established for you is for building up in the power of the word. And I have my word and the power of rediscovery of what you can become, I will show you all of this and more and more.
Do not be troubled by your thoughts of unworthiness My Son, you are worthy of grace and healing and time and care when you are in Yeshua and if not what is the use of living? You can look upon it now and I will support and be close and near to you as always My Son.

9-14-99

A time for us, My Son it gratifies Me in such a wonderful way that you are obedient to Me and have formed yourself to My will in your life. As our relationship grows deeper, higher actually, there are times the evil one will come against you. That is his trait, and he presses you very much. That happened today for you but it is now the related truth that it was for moving out in glory closer to Me which is what you had prayed for last night. I answered your prayer and the evil one cursed your flesh.
I heal you now of the emotions and I declare you are now through the trial, stronger than ever, but lifted in glory level and hearing Me as you have prayed.
I will reveal and talk and write to you each time you seek me My Son. You have touched My heart with your innocence and your want of learning My word and your continued compassion for those around you. Your gift of healing and counseling and faith and prophecy will be built up each and every day. I provide you with the things that you need and want and I remove the things from you that you do not. Do not fear the removal of some people from your life, you have value in Me and are free from condemnation in Yeshua. Others will always want you My Son, they will want what you have, what you offer, how you glow. You are now worth what I have bestowed upon you, you will never be worth less than this. I never remove the glow, you will however be worth more and more and more in heart points and love walk as you grow on. A larger portion I have given you My Sweet Son. I will fulfill My heartfelt loving child, let the world still go for a short time, I will complete.

9-17-99

I speak to you throughout the times of your day. When you doubt what I'm doing in your life bind the feelings and give them to Me. Do I not want you to always be in fellowship with Me? Yes I do, and do you think I would leave you abandoned and so rejected as you were when it was I who worked with you to bring you out of all of these areas? My Son, I am so close to you all the time, do not doubt or fear. I do a new thing and unique work in you My Son, there will be in these later times you My Son that I will raise up and I will be closer and closer as you draw closer to Me. There of course will be others that work in my Kingdom they will be called, Children of God they will be other people of the Kingdom of God. I will use all of the gifts that I bestowed upon you and I will uphold you to My plan. I have this for you in your life, I have tried and tested the iron that is you and It is turned into silver and then into gold. My Son your heart is truly made of pure gold. All of the dross has been fired away. That is why you feel so vulnerable to the world because you must rely upon Me for your strength. I have stepped back from you My Son, for a moment, to strengthen you, it has to be done and yet I never remove My will and plan from you. You have been adjusting your perceptions and yes your dreams and your subconscious mind to My precepts. It takes time, time, time, to your perception to rebuild you and yet I did not put you in fear of what really had to be done to repair the damage done to your body, Soul and Spirit. Woe be to the one who will try to touch my anointed, again. I will heal all of the places of your life My Son, I have brought you so far already to the place that you desire to be. Wait with me and hold to Me as we continue to grow you back into my reality, God's reality. It will be a change of life for you. No, you are not doing things wrong or causing them to go slower. Be at peace with your own self, you are beautiful to behold to me my child. I had told you of your self-worth and that it would be the largest struggle for you to face, you are being reconstructed My Son, that is something that the evil one sees and absolutely despises. For a rebuild submitted man just like a freight train cannot be easily stopped. It will be you. You will not be able to be stopped at all. I have anointed you for great things, My Son, I have to call some of my worthy children to higher levels of My Spirit and to greater calls upon their lives. Your attitude shows me your humility and your form-ability to be molded to My will for you. Write this my child, you are a child of my universe, you have a right to be more, do you see the writing from the poem „Desert errata„. Do you now see how I work? A nibble from your memory makes a confirmation for you to feed you know. I gently direct you to these things as I control all of the conditions of your life. You are called to be more and that requires a tremendous sacrifice on your part which you have made in obedience to Me. I have made promises to you in a word here on paper and I have written them on your Spirit. I will bring you to the fulfillment of all of them when you lay their worry at My feet. I do minister healing to you here now as we write these words. I have moved you into great areas of insight and revelation as we have worked through the dark forest of training and reconstruction. My Son these great strides along with the tremendous anointing you have received are upon you and you are victorious over the responsibility. You know what that means, I give you more and more revelation of My Spirit to you all of the time and know you do not need to be in fear when and if your flesh speaks up, you are still flesh but I look at your Spirit and the Goldenness of your heart. I will guide, I will not let you fall, I will tell you of things, things of the Kingdom of Heaven. Always remember I am Spirit and love. I love you so and you fulfill Me with what you will become, the words flow from you as a river of water that lives forever My Son, that Is the river of living water that you felt to turn worthy to write about.
Now My Son, I tricked you a bit and formed the words differently but I showed you that I am in these words. You are worthy My Son of the grace and the love upon you, you were growing into the call of My Beloved, you will bring forth justice to the Gentiles. You will set so many of my children free. You have paid the price for the anointing for it comes from the compassionate healed Son of the Savior Yeshua the Christ. It has to be real My Son, all of this, for it is to gentle and we are at ease and logical it cannot be any part of delusional. My decisions for waiting on restoration of some things until the proper time is based upon My wisdom and your giving of your will to Me for my perfect will to be done. You My Son will be joyful, you My Son will be secure in relationships, you My Son will be strong as my confident warrior. You My Son have given to Me joy and what I can do with a broken man, a man of My creation, a child of Grace, My Child of fulfillment.
Your Loving Father.

9-20-99

It is as simple as It appears to you but more fulfilling than you think. My writing with you as this. I have blessed you with this writing. Oh yes, I have written to my Sons in the past but very few. You My child are one of My select few. I chose you to put My Spirit upon, it does mean a difficult time with the enemy and doubt within yourself but more the less God talking and relating things is that you need to know. I can bless you in other places also but here it Is protected and quiet. Your healing time needs a quiet place away from the sensory things that can distract you. I asked that you be cleansed, which you are always willing to do and to be sensitive to My Spirit. As your Creator, I know just what you need. You need this time here so that I can heal and restore you. Yes, we have moved Into a new round, restoration along with the healing. Do not fear the things not done yet or the things you are so bothered about not being finished. I will in my time, which is perfect, restore and Issue in a new and wonderful way. I have the need as you do to reacquaint you with the importance of these times. They will not be as frequent now as you are beginning to be more busy with other things but more of the Heavenly as you feel here and the peace is My presence most assuredly visited upon you to bless you and keep you close to Me your Creator Father. You are most worthy of this blessing My Son, you have been through a tremendous amount of reconstruction and warfare, you have been built up as a mountain of a servant of God. I am pleased but prudent with you as My Son not to overwhelm you again. You could truly write a book of what huge experiences we have had together. I will encourage you here My Son, I will work with you on things you will need to do. I will watch over you so closely to make sure you walk with Me as blessed. Do not worry about others for right now. I'm handling so many things for you and it is my delight to do so, I am watching over areas of your life for you.
You do still struggle with some things In the flesh, but that is of the world and I want you to be free of the fears that harass you. This is the way My Son, you answered My call and turned your life to Me. I will be so very careful with you and your newfound Spirit. You have been changed by the hand of God into a new person that is ready soon to do warfare on the cosmic level and yet to touch with the love of the one true Christ, a broken and hurting heart here on the earth. You are my healing one My Son, do not turn back and do not shrink back for it is for you. I have refashioned you and you have become the Pearl of great price. You will not feel so frustrated and hollow soon, I will reintroduce all of the delights of this world back into you My Son. Trust and believe in Me I hold you in high regard for the sacrifice you have made for Me and the obedience you have shown to Me, I will follow you, I will resolve to you your grace of all the issues you are concerned with these last weeks. I want you just as you are, just as you are being formed. The love I have for you is so boundless and I will exhibit it to you also My Son. You are not questioning in your mind in a wrong way My Son, you are functional in the realm of the Creator Spirit. My children strive to be here. You have achieved by my Grace and through trial. I am the judge, I have judged you worthy of this anointed gift. Flow with me and we will visit the mountains. I will be with you in Grace, your Father.

9-21-99

There is restoration going on here in the presence of the Lord My Son. Do not worry, sleeping or reflecting here I am moving to restore you throughout. The tiredness is you acclimating back Into life. I know you want it all right now but you must be healed slowly so that you will then be in life as I have formed it for you. I must prosper your mind and your attitudes now for they have been ravaged by things and are being reformulated. It will not go on forever My Son.
Crave for my perfect will to be done in your life and then my child you do agonize over what I will do with you rest and it will come in Peace for you. Son, the decisions I've made for you are strong decisions made for the long haul. I have made long-range plans for you with regards to your home, your business, your family life, and your physical body and your moods. I have set all of these things at rest in your life so that you could discover your life. I must still guide you into the most confusing and difficult perception yet. You're worth and value to you. So that you will be stronger in what you are and what you will not turn from any challenge that I or this world puts in front of you. It has been Me as the responsible one my Son. It has been Me so close to you and yes it has been Me removing most of your life as you knew it to stop you. I stopped you, I stopped your life for this time, I left some things going so you would have some fullness, but mainly, it is why it feels so hollow. I am sorry my Son, you were so broken that this had to be done. Only I could heal you and only I could take this much time so that you could be used to do so. It is you I have viewed, as being so broken. It was for you that I caused these things to be done in your life because I would not have you lost. You are worthy of this call my Son, you are destined to be great my Son. So many of my children will look at you for care, look to you for care. Be at peace, that you are within the will of God, I'm holding you here so that you are healed, protected, restored. Be calm, be pleasant, be resolved to do what I want you to do. This will bring you peace, I do love you so. The way you submit yourself to Me, I will add back to you your life all that was taken from you for you to be saved. You my Son were saved twice and you are so worth It for what we are doing. The time spent here with me heals you so deeply, though you do not feel that so much I am working to restore and to do so many things for you to save and to restore to heal to make you whole for me for my use for My Kingdom.
The enemy knew what you would be and he held Me to the legalism he has used for love to oppress you and all you had. You are victorious with Yeshua my Son. I held the boundaries carefully, it was a battle for you My Child. I am real and all of my words to you are real, in this world you will have this perception. In the next world with Me you will have bliss. I an so supernaturally normal we can commune like this as the world goes by, it is my world remember. You are here for this relationship and what can grow from it to encourage others. Let Me develop my plan in your life my sweet. Let Me use you to discover you, to expound you, to show you and the others if we do what can happen in these times between a Father and his Son, I remain yours, your heavenly Father.

9-25-99

Sweet Son, you ask so little of Me and yet you give so much. I am delighted in what you have done this last week but also accumulating over time to become stronger, you are stronger, closer to Me, we are much closer, and a much more standup man. I am proud of what I have made but I am proud of what you have helped yourself become. The ministry time was exactly my will for you to minister that way. You my Son, have a true power and anointing of the Holy Spirit. More important yet Is the love of the Yeshua that flows through you when you minister to another. I will grant your prayers for who you minister for and yes, I want you my loving child to minister to my children. My plan for the desires of your heart has been just that, you my child will minister to the select children I send to you. I will open your mind to just what has to be done and I will anoint your voice to send darkness away from people's lives. I will provide my Son, I allow it.
To not be dismayed or discouraged about your strength returning my Son. Do not let the enemy dissuade you either. You my Son will be strong in body and Soul and Spirit, I do this and it is my plan to build you slowly my Son and to put you first, not an easy task for you, for a time you must understand your needs and I will move to fulfill them. It is not all in your understanding why some things must be left as they are but it is my knowledge of the universe. I know that you rely upon Me so I want you to let go, and let Me, let go and let Me, let go and let me, let Me help you to see, I love you so, your Father.

9-28-99

I could not love you more My Child. I do not feel love In the sense of feelings, I am love according to how I am made up. Feelings, can be told and moved to and fro in the world, you currently reside In, but I exist In love. In love and out in Spirit and being. You will learn more of this mighty child. I am love and Spirit for you to know Me and you love Me. I do not have to feel ready to love. I am always ready for love. Love casts out all fear. I do not fear. When you love Me all fear goes packing. I will help you with us and all other things you are hearing now. I said I will never leave you. If I helped you with the huge areas of your life why will I not help you with the small ones? Of course I will. We will do them together but with the inspiration of the Holy Spirit is where you can rely. Rise up against the fear and bind it mighty child, it is a robber of peace and I want you to be at peace. What I minister to you in peace much more is accomplished, for then when fear is not present you are In strength. Your mind wants to understand why do you fear? You fear the unknown. That is not trusting in Me enough. I've said I guide you and you are obedient to Me and what I call you to be with me, what is the problem? Unbelief and what I have for you, lack of faith? You know, just unbelief and what you are feeling. Plop it all down at my feet and claim a super cleansing of your feelings, emotions, from the inside of you, let me do it and I buy My Spirit I will set you free. Do not listen to the world and the worldly ideas you have. I am your Creator, and I know what My Son needs. Resting in me, seek me, claim all you, and believe you are blessed by Me, because at the same time you lay all of these things of discomfort out at My feet I am removing them from you because you are also sitting at My feet learning about Me and My word and My style. I have blessed you with one of My best training programs. It is so custom-designed for you to fit it perfectly. Many things by a set in motion, just for you because you are special. You are worthy of My call and you are worthy of being special with special treatment for you going forth. I have asked you and told you also to indulge yourself more My Son. It is a strength builder, I am watching you so ever closely to maintain your healing and health full recovery. Did I call you in such wild times to not stay by you for some unconventional help for you and some self-indulgence to help build your self-worth? No, it is not you being prideful for I know the healing that needs to be done. I say again give to your self My Son and enjoy what you give to self. I will watch over you and inspire you in great ways, you warm yourself moving more and more up your healing plan but you must be strengthened with things blessed and taken for you. Again I say I am guiding you My Son, you have not done things wrong. Pushed through in many ways you have, I will always be close, bind all fear and worry. bind all disbelief. Ask for the filling of strength and power. I will account it with grace. You have not gone ahead with striving My Son, therefore you have not had strife. Now I want you to go on reclaiming and reclaiming with your good attitude. I will be your strength, trust Me in this, your heavenly Father.

10-2-99
Malachi 4-2

just as you have ministered to My children I will minister to you My precious Son of Spirit and growth. I will inspire you and strengthen you as you have so wonderfully done for others. You cause the love of Yeshua to come through you and have poured yourself over dry and broken lives. Where deception was you stated truth, where loss was you cleansed and injected the oil of gladness. I am delighted with how you minister to others and I will heal you all the more as we move from closeness to close as this. Your power and anointing that you have received from Me enables you to do all that your mind and Spirit imagine. You asked Me to be there at the ministry time Friday, I would not let you get hurt yet this false rushing had to be seen. You redeemed every one of my children. It is will My and faith that now comes into play. I will shower My grace down upon the entire life and confirm it to you.
The things of a troubled Spirit can be a burden to you. I showed My new ideas with you. I have called many My Son but you continue to be My careful challenge. I insist My perfect will upon you. Do not discouraged but be beside Me My chosen one with all I have the planned for you. It will be for building up in you the most delightful way. It will confound others My Son, trust in Me, faith in Me. What I do may have the humble beginnings now as you have been living through, but the big areas I will move you into Will astound you. I know you will move into them with grace and integrity for that is how I found you. Allow it to grow from the seed I planted in you to grow and come to fruit. I cover all and that was you for the loving Son that you are. Others will watch stunned, it is all Me, you are My Shining Star. Your loving Father.

10-6-99

My Son there is always time for this. This writing is the very basis of life between the Father and his Son. Do not fear the feelings you have about your body. It is a step of faith for you to go into this again. It is not an attachment for you to be concerned about. I am here with you and I provide for all things. I will reacquaint you with your relationship and all things will be brought back together again as you request and prayers to me. Do not let the enemy get inside of you with condemning thoughts it is for you My Son. All of My things come to you as a gift, they are natural, their desire, they are of Me to bring life to you. All of the things that I bring to you are for guiding, for building up.
Recall My Son I told you all of those things for building up are of God, all of those things for tearing down are of satan.
I stand with you as your Father.

10-7-99

You are obedient to the urgings of My Spirit. You are obedient to My thoughts and ideas of My Spirit also. Who but you can touch Me so sweetly with your humble manner. I call you to be separate with Me and that is so I can heal and repair that which was harmed. You are wonderfully made and believe in Me that you are capable of total restoration. When in fact it will be a new awakening you will be living through. When you tarry here with Me the time is concentrated. I listened to every thought you have no matter how insignificant to you, I have told you I am reformulating your mind In my way. That takes time and you are frustrated about it. You do not want the oppression that comes from a miracle of quick proportions and I know a slow shield is safer healed and safer healed is healed for life. I want you to have new life My Son, you must take the test today and I know that all things will work together for good because you are My obedient Son. You are my challenging Creation and I learned as I go on and on with you. You are being healed of the pain of that instance now, and all instances for I heal all things. I'm sorry you hurt from the experiences but the learning is behind us and I value the depth in which you felt the pain, each thought I watch, your heart and Spirit are My delight and I will hold you more near. Joy will abound in your life as my grace is bestowed upon you. Look not to the thoughts, except My grace and love upon you as my acceptance of all that you do. Do not continue to be harsh upon yourself, it stops your worthiness, and I have told you and showed you it is important and this aspect of your complete restoration needs to be brought forth and embraced. You were chosen by Me, anointed by Me, growing in Me, obedient in Me, when I look for you I find you in Me and in My Son, Yeshua. Hold to that, there is not one Better Place to be in the cosmos than to be with Me I am your Creator, you are My Son.
I am your Father.

10-17-99

Grace unto you my Son. I'm with you always and always. You feel that I'm distant but that feeling Is from you and from your thoughts that are not peaceful and opened like now. You know you feel it, the warmth, the voice. You're fretting about the life when in fact I hold all the cards and have all the plans. I want you to know that you are within my will and my plan for you. You have obediently submitted yourself to Me and what I have for you and my delight is with you. I have huge plans for you My Son, the plans with me will pave the way for you to have completeness.
Let me be the responsible one, My Son you taken on too many burdens of life and worry over them. I came so you could have life and have It abundantly. Now Son, there are still yet things I am doing in you. Things are building up and never tearing down. I'm keeping these close rains upon you so that you will heal properly. What is the purpose of holding you back so much? Do you realize yet what you are to Me? I have called you from the life of religious confusion and flesh feelings with deadly prospects going on to be with Me and Me with you. It is in reality a close walk, a higher call, Son, I am near as I need to be. It is a challenge to rebuild you from the inside out, my children have become complex in their end times vices. I am strong My Son and I want you to remember nothing is too difficult for Me. Is this too difficult for you My Son? Know My Son as you remain close to me I remain close to you. Your flesh would tell you that it is your Spirit, would it not? Your flesh wants things right now or at least soon but things that are having are bound to take time. I will use you in great ways my child, you are as innocent as a child to me and when even your flesh is rebellious I delight in you. I must have you wait with me while you are rebuilt according to my specifications. You have made some sacrifices for the sake of healing yes, but believe Me I am the Father of fairness and all things work together for those who love the Lord. I see your heart and I see that you love Me. You wanted to know that didn't you? You doubted even the love you have for me because you feel so unworthy. You My Son are worthy, you My Son are worthy of the call I have placed upon your life. You My Son are worthy of all I have in store for you. You My Son must bind your flesh and allow your sweet Spirit to move forth more. You are growing so much My Son, trust in me, trust in you also or my voice to the Son is a blessing, a blessing that is found as I took over my creation just like the example you have given in ministry appointments. My children glow when I engaged upon them. The darkness of this world is real and dangerous for my children that I have given what is needed to be victorious and I watch very carefully. Do not fear, I hold the boundaries carefully, I only know, I only know things that must be done to and through you. I hold you close and you are never out of my eyesight. You are that special to me. I want completeness for you and for the anointing I have bestowed upon you. Look not to the others and what they have for you now. I judge as a fair measure My Son, hold to Me with your wonderful heart and I will unfold the mysteries of life, of actual life to you. Your faith grows as does your anointing. You are trying so hard to be what I want, do you not think I noticed all you do? It is by your creator, I am for all years but I hear all the others say, and I am here for you, blessings, your Father.

10-25-99

Listen close to me now as we arrive near to each other. By an act of your will given to Me I suddenly am near to you. Giving yourself over to your creator takes the responsibility of harsh life situations from you for this time. Peace with me, Creator, more healing for you. You are yielded to me and the Spirit of the Father, the Creator.
So much is folly my submitted Son, so much is for the purpose of stress and living for the standard of the world. I say it Is not the standard of the Spirit. I ask you to choose life in the Spirit my Son. It is not a sham, it is a benefits bonus that will always be with you. You have chosen Spirit life with me here, I can minister to you in a completeness here. You are such a delight to me, all the days you have given to me, I have watched you struggle with your mind and the sadness that seems to surround it. I have written through you correctly, I said seems to, you are healing, yes still my Son but you have crawled out of the dark places with your strength, that is my prize! I do not want you to have to cry out to me and grow angry with Me because of the frustration of your mind within you. There have been attacks to hold you back and there have been time issues that you have had to deal with because you've had been deeply wounded, but the pains you have had you will not have to go back to again. I promised you my Son I will not have you burdened by the attacks and with life and hurt and Spirit wrenching trials. I have kept out of all the pains of your mind that you had to go through they were like so much of the past life and will be delivered from you and end. I write the new words to you now, you are life and I have chosen life to my Son I will give more life to my Son. Your Father.

10-26-99

Son, all things will work together for the purpose I've called you to. I have removed the oppression that was around you for the last two days and I have bound it from you now forever. I am healing your tolerant Spirit, I protect you from these things and yet those did enter into you to harm you. I am sorry for the diabolical nature of the enemy is vast and chances taken that push my tolerance are always having to be dealt with. I restore the fibers of your mind in careful order, for the healed Son that I create Is the embodiment of light and love with compassion. Yes, the scarred hand is the best to help another up. I'm close by you and I will continue the healing. Your Father.

11-1-99

You have suffered much for My sake, that will eventually be for your sake of my child. Look at what you have become, I will assist to look closely as I have been doing for a long time now as I reform you into what will be needed for your happiness in life and for the kingdom work we have planned. No My Son that you are only within my will for all of the things that you have done. I am watching over you in such closely and careful ways, I need to. I will not have you fall or have you hurt. Some things I have allowed to be on you to test you yes, but to strengthen and stretch you for your perfect growth. Do you know that you have perfect growth? When I move upon your life and you are within my will and you are improving according to my set standards you are growing, re-growing perfectly? That is my truth to you live on.
You had neither the desire nor the energy nor the passion to do the things you used to do. That is the change, I, put you through. I can know that the things seemingly, left behind, are unimportant in comparison to you My Child. Be outlined to life and belief. The time of healing and teaching and warfare for you was totally necessary for the survival and for your growth. Remember my will for you is perfect and you are within my will. Do not fear the completion of this process, however long My Son you are so worth the time. The things that have waited for this time are both unimportant and will be completed within my time.
Gifts to you and then I will use the experience and most of all the compassion you have learned during this time of aware and parked I have had you move through. All has been for building up of your body, Soul, mind and Spirit. Do not let the insignificant Ideas of a few people or the debasing threads of the enemy create torment for you. My plan is for the sweet time alone we have stood. You have learned a great deal about Me and I about you in these times of your life. Do not grieve the times of your life when you were not happy. I tell No lie, all that I am that I am restoring you to not only that enjoyment level but beyond that in is with peace with Me. Your reward will be great My Son. I do not promise things lately to my children as I have with you and it truly shows with you love for Me and our relationship growing at this rate. You will be restored and have a whole life upon the earth with Me. That closeness we have is an accomplishment. The anointing for your life will bring you power and the fulfillment's house (your house) of the things I have planned for it, for you,, will bring a deep satisfaction to your body, Soul and your Spirit. I promise and write these things to you to exhort you in a meaningful way. This is not now or ever has been a sham or a deception. You are gently guided by your Spirit to cling to Me as I form thoughts and ideas into your head to write down. I am the same God of Isaiah and Yeshua. I move through the heavens to come to my creation. I inspire some and as you My Son was this profound gift of prophetic writing. You are worthy of this blessed gift for the closeness that it brings us is the truth kid. I am reforming you Son, fair or not, you are in My perfect will My Son, didn't you know? You are my called and chosen vessel My Son, grow with Me. You are called according to My purpose, submit to me and my quoted word to you is for regrowth and blessing, Heavens enjoyed. I promise to you fulfillment and truthfulness. Trust in me and what I have established In you in exactly the correct time and you will know the blessings of the who and what you are. Peaceful resolve My Son. And allow me to guide. Your Father.

11-2-99

I am so sorry My Child. I have again pushed you too far and have cost discouragement to enter into you emotionally and Spiritually. I tried to stretch you and train you and cause you to be in warfare far too deeply without the weapons of your wits that you need to stave off the darkness and the tormentor. I have hurt you deeply, I can now see it in your Spirit and heart and mind. I was wrong, I was mistaken for what I have done to you, please forgive me for pushing you into fire and fighting and something you are still learning about. I have not restored the things I told you that I would so you could fight.
Thank you for coming back to this quiet place for restoration My Son the things you are struggling with in your heart are real and active. I value what you feel and think. I must always learn from my children about things that they can and cannot endure. I'm so sorry I pushed you to fire and did not trust you as I needed to. Do not think the old religious way of perfection and absolutes My Son. I am changing in my plans and areas all the time and they do make mistakes, which I fix, I will fix the pain with you. I am watching over you, I will never leave you. I will heal what I have done. I will recompense, use on in your way and I declare unto you the spirits of all the emotions and despair and oppression will never again torment you. Your emotions are now set apart from the world. I will produce for you the new blessing. Your Father.

11-5-99

Look at what you have done for the Kingdom! I am most pleased and yes you are completely within My will your life. Do remember I always want you to be at peace. Peace so that you can hear clearly from Me. Rest all the time, I will tell you to sew into yourself My Son so that you can be restored. Do not look for all of the answers just yet Son. I will perform My word and let you know many of the secrets of the Kingdom of God but not all of them just yet. I do not want you to be subjected to all of that Information just yet.
You are doing so many things I guided you into. Do not fear the few things behind. I will make all things work together to those who are called by My name. You are in the will and the walking of the Lord. Abide in Me and I will go in all of the things around you. Oh yes, you are most powerful in the Spirit realm. Both for your knowledge and for the compassion. That is the area the enemy has tried to oppress you in. Blocks upon your mind and anger to your emotions. I will stop all and restore all he knew my Child. Your Father.

11-10-99

There is healing in My words to My Son. I want to press you into writing with Me at this time. I am normally a God of one who untangles to the fresh world for I am the God of discovery to my children but for you right now I want you to have this record of where you were or you can see where I will bless you to be. I'm trying to develop you so carefully My Son. It takes a long time to redo to my standards what needs to be done. You will never be unhappy with the extent of areas we have done and gone too to provide you with the rest you need. Your rest is of paramount need for you right now and has been for a long time to you. You are cut up by the flesh experiences and you are allowing your feelings to rule your emotions. Your feelings are affected by these environments and people. Bind them, you are not wrong to have and consider feelings but you must not have them rule you. Where are you My Son? You are giving the thoughts to me and I'm taking them for your perceptions. Fear not, I will prevail, find the troubled thoughts and Secrets. I love you, your Father.

11-13-99

I will soothe your hurts in my love and understanding so that you will be soothed and mended in this your true time of need. My Son lay the cares that have just consumed you down at My feet and leave them there. The thoughts and worries of this life are no match for my will to be done in your life. They're not! I am not foreshortened from you. I am not the Meeny, withholding things from you for My own reasons. You are growing very quickly each day My Son. Do not listen to your worldly attitudes and thought processes that would tell you that you are left behind, or haven't paid enough penance yet for all of your wrongdoings.
Those thoughts are wrong, I find them and I cast them into the outer darkness to stay. I will not ever leave you My Son. You are called according to my purpose and I do see the end even now. You are trying in your own understanding and thought process to make an effort to make you better. You cannot do this. It is going to be Me changing you according to my word being done in your life. You must take your hands off all of these things. You are agonizing over what you have no control over. I am moving in your life for I know the perfection of what you need to end up. I have singled you out to do this with this reworking in you. It will not be more than your can bear and it will be for the building of you as renewed in the all you are involved with. I've chosen you My child, you are my child of promise. Hold to Me as only you can and decide to do and I will see you through all that needs to be done to complete you for My use.
You now feel broken, that is my will for you for through brokenness only is rebirth. Only through bleak feelings can restoration take place. Only in the end of yourself is the right way to find me. Know you do not understand all of what I'm doing, you are not Me. You must trust in Me that at the end of you I will lift you up then. I will exalt you then My Child. Lean not on your own understanding you do not have the capacity to understand all that I'm doing in and around you. Trust in the God of all righteousness that I keep my vows and I keep my promises. I would not do such a major flesh and Spirit and Soul work on you if I didn't have greatness planned for you. I'm not wasting time with you My Son. I am in control of all things My Son. Rest in Me and the things passed through Me, not through you. I have called you to this walk for I knew and know you very well. I know what you want and I am doing things behind your scenes to provide for you. Your Father.

11-17-99
Just put pen to paper My Child for your Heavenly Father is there with you for encouragement and strength building. Welcome into My presence My Child, I continue to gently guide and direct you into the man I want you to become. I am here as I promised you through all of the learning trials you need to go through. I bring the experiences to you to gently encourage you because I will not suffer you to exposure of too much of Me, I am very big you know. We do take longer careful steps but the strength built within your Soul will be that much more strong. When I'm with you as I have been you hear My voice in a human way with human emotion and humanlike reactions. Well, are you not made in my Image? You worry that the voice you hear is too much you, bind this for it is just evil influence, upon you. This is not the case, to My Son, our heartfelt gentleness and grace with my Spirit upon you. I have called just you just for that reason. I am pleased to the level of delightedness that you answered My call with obedience and a quest of love for the Father that I hold carefully within my heart. You are my special song, I do seduce you in this way to show you how much I love you and to cut through your old walls of unworthiness in telling recrimination. Be gentle with yourself as I am with you here and you will heal more quickly. I love you My Son just where you are. There are no things to recount. If anything needed to be cleaned up you can count upon Me to be gentle and kind with you. My Son do not let your heart be troubled about your past. It is taken in bond for you and I to heal you back to life in this time of my world. Be pleased with you and be at peace with Me it is my praise to you.
Let me reassure you with still more, the things you have imagined have been guided by me so therefore they are well within the parameters of truth. The situations you have still questioned with your mind are also guided by me and therefore also within truth. Do you wonder why I still draw so close to you? You My child are My Shining Star. The light of My Son Yeshua emanated from within you when you minister to others but also you just are beaming. You are also My star player saved for the end times to be used by me to bind up the enemy in ways that are sure and strong. You are My light to the world through the darkness. Evil would have stopped you at every turn but I am victorious through you and know the gift of faith and the power of the anointing bestowed upon you. You will not have to clamor for my blessings as others will try to achieve what you have. Except my gift upon you because I can give and I know all. Recall this time of closeness and revisit these as much as you can. I'm here to bless you with my all in all My Son. Your Father.

11-22-99

It is alright My Son, I am most assuredly here to help you. I must hold to some of my precepts of you being away here with Me, I need you to hear me clearly so that we can commune in a closer way. You and this writing time is Important for I heal you and relate truths to you and for you. You have been rather stuck in self-condemnation and also in false realities. I am still stretching you and it is painful I know, but it must be done. When you remember coming to the end of you is Me, it helps you to realize how much you can rely upon Me to do the things for you. I will set the worry level and I said it had to be 0%. I will take over much more of you now for a time In this your time of need.
It is not a problem, just an instance. I will grow you more and more each day by these easy and very gentle steps. You are harsh upon yourself but I am careful and gentle because I know you are still my healing man. Be not in any fear and be not afraid of any holdbacks or failures. I direct these things for you now and I will guide. You know you have not failed My Sweet Son I have healed and let the light inside of you for I have set the task at hand. I will now bless and guide you in all that you need. Absolutely fair amount and move on gently. I know what you are made of even if you do not see it clearly. In you is My growing and energizing Son of Spirit and promise, there truly is an end to these frustrating times of waiting on Me. You see I am doing still many things behind your scenes. Preparing many things for you to move into and to be blessed with as your new life moves on and on. I say your new life My Son because it is a new life. You are now free of the medicines and drugs that destroyed your mind, and you are healed of the Depression and literal vicious words of yourself underneath your breath. You are free from under the burnout you suffered through from working so much and striving so hard to please people around you to get them to love you. You are delivered from every stronghold and those oppressed ideas in your thoughts and your life and you have grown through them to forgive and pray for those who tortured and abused you. You've also come in to My world of kooky people trying to discern my direction and have melded in and loved them as they have loved you. You help my children when you were at your worst and you have still given them all my best. I will not ever forget one Son who ministers love to others when HE needs those things seen to desperately himself. You have graced Me with poignant prayers that have numbered in the thousands mostly for others. You have risen as a global commander above the money rent pit of darkness you were thrust into being called by Me at that time of your life. You formed valiantly and completely in righteousness and honor and you have risen above all of my expectations In learning how the evil one works so that you now have direct knowledge and anointing on to defeat him. You have done all of this without crying out or bending a bruised reed as I told you in my word as I say you would have to do. You have honored Me by being the shining star of promise fulfilling My scripture so totally. That is why the anointing was there at the prayer group. The scripture was the example of you My Son. Isaiah 42 is now not just for you that I declare it is you!
You have risen above the call I have had for you and still you want it all. I know your makeup My Son and I know your strength. I may build you up more and more to your pain and frustration but I know your might. It is the Lord's might. You are now in the Word of God my precious one, my precious Child. That's the all of use Me My Son. I'm here refuse any darkness, you have achieved the glory step, know My Son. I love so deeply someone so strong and enduring in this call, I use you then in this on and on. Hold in trust in Me and I will rise you on to the heights. Believe in this as the Son goes, in My word, You are blessed. Your Father.

11-27-99

You have gone through a great deal of trials and tests and remember My Son, I had taken responsibility for the things removed from you In past writings. I now reiterate what I said, I remove the desire from you for many things. It was to slow you down and to protect you from yourself and this world which always uses up those people with a lot to give. I stopped you from giving to others for a time, that is what it is still hard for you to give anything of yourself away now. I am running the show. You did give of yourself blindly and became used by others. That cycle had to be broken and it takes a long time. You found fulfillment from giving to others and now you feel mainly, unfulfilled, that is what set your emotions into a lethargic feeling you have, but I fear and wonder not. Like always I will be all the more sweet when I release you back Into a healthy give-and-take life. You still cannot give to yourself enough but it is changing slowly. I have moved in your mind as I have showed you in your vision of brain cells changing the patterns of thoughts. You are separate because you are called by Me. It is a sacrificing call. It is a thought cleansing and restructuring but it is also one more thing, it is truth and it is right. It is not a phony or a ethereal however Spiritual it may be. It takes time, time of set-aside for you, do not feel guilty, not one thing that is being set aside is of value for the end result. Always waiting is hard, but rewards come to those who wait, and I am controlling all other things I need you to learn a few more things as always My Son. I need to watch you go through the changes I have subjected you to and then see how you would react. I did leave David out in the desert for 15 years to see how he would react under pressure. I know it amazes you when I compare you to the examples of the word of God but what else am I to use? You are growing in the ways of My children of old and you are doing it in the ways of God and in My directed ways and so I will continue to use these examples for you. I am restoring you In your subconscious mind and the primitive levels first. Dreams in life, love and fulfillment will be restored soon My Son. You keep Me challenged and My call is to fill your life to the call we have agreed upon. Your frustration is expected, tell me all you feel, I'm listening to all you say My Son. I have my eye and my heart upon you, I know you more and more all the time. Watch Me move in your life now as things come together more and more In this world. I am totally pleased with you and I will shower love and grace upon you more and more. You will have all the things you have prayed to me for. I will fulfill, I do not forget, just hold on for now through the trying times. I have put you through all of these things for reason and a purpose. I will provide reward and an award for I called and I have chosen you as Son. I stated I am for you, bless. Your Father.

12-4-99

Your mornings have been said because I do so much work through your dreams. I have learned of you now and you are feeling more calm about the experiences I bring through your dreams. The reactions I would like you now to try to have are ones of peace and resolve and of trust. If the tears flow let them, I am then healing a major area of your life. I've learned how to be now very careful with your emotions My special Child. Inside your Spirit now when you look close is Me. I'm watching very carefully. I will not subject you to too much My Son, your trust and faith in me with belief in understanding creates the love between us. I will never go back, will you?
Do not judge yourself with aspects of Bible reading and typing and what you are doing day to day and do not listen and take for truth all that you hear from others. My voice Is true and clear to you each day and I am directing knowledge and Information for you. The comments are from Me. Not all know all truth, you are to listen respectfully and listen to „Me Intently„. Your heart will tell you.
You will never be alone My love, I am here for you and it is as close as your set eye gaze. Grow on with Me. I will fill the sadness and lack of drive and energy soon with joy and energy. My word to you is „resolved„. Film I will be My son and I will fill your life with new clean wonderful living things that will cause you to be joyful and peaceful, a strong contender, like Yeshua My Son. Your Father

12-7-99

Yes My Son you have truly been through a lot of things over the past few years. There is one very stabilizing factor throughout the time, I was always here with you. Oh, there were sometimes when we got a little messed up with our communication, but Son My arm was never far away from you to swoop you up if needed and then needed. You have grown My Child. I call you My child and yet you are My Mature Man of God today. You are light unto the paths of many and I will use your luminosity to light the way for many. I am still most critically taking care of things In you, in your life, try to not let this worry you. Remember you have given yourself over to Me in all areas and as in my promise, I'm watching and guiding you and all others around you to harmony and peace. Remember It is the light that is in and through you that others want and need. I am training you in so many ways to help others with this I want you to be relieved and also released from most of these life responsibilities for now. Do not fear, I will restore you to fullness and as you are closely tied Interactively to Me I will reinstate all the necessary weights of responsibility in your life.
I've called you differently My Son, I have called you very quickly and severely from this world coming to the world and life of the Holy Spirit. I know what you were and just what you would be before I called to you. Yes My Son it has occurred just as your Spirit has witnessed it to you. Yeshua a made the first move to you and told you things that will come to pass. The enemy did come In to stop you at all costs right away after My Son Yeshua spoke to you. Are not the things that My Son had spoken to you coming to pass for I am just God and I know how very hard you try to accomplish all I have placed before you? The enemy then did play you in a very real and particular way for a time. Realize now, he had started you down a false road in your entire life as he does with all of My children, for he knew, sensed, gathered how powerful and loyal to the cause of Christ you would be. You My Son have overcome things which I have never before allowed upon my children. You have been victorious over mountains of the oppression the enemy had dished out to you. Yeshua then did turn you over to me to take over training and protection of you. You needed that hand to guide you and to hide you from the enemy, My hand, remember the voice from the Spirit of Yeshua saying, 'Father this one is for you to train now for he has accepted Me into his heart and is ready to accept the call you have for him'? I have gone so very close to you My Son, as I have said, different from the rest. Your humbling of yourself before Me and others is the obedience I desire from you. I will exalt the humble. Rest in peace and Me My Son is your key to My favor upon you. The writing is from my heart to yours according to need. You „have' to hear from Me, other areas of waiting are of little or no consequence for now. Worry not and we will have a lead from what life had created in you as I create life in you new. I will create a new many things now in your life, I'm starting with the last child and I will finish with a blessing for others. I weaved the words together for you very carefully without you perceiving them all as you write. It is I, your Father, you turned to me, come to me, heal with me, learn from me. Know my word as you are learning yes but, know, my words to you here are the Fathers to his Son.

12-22-99

Away from the world I invite you here to be closer to Me so you can hear from Me, Yes really Me. You can here block out the deafening sounds of the world and actually hear from the Creator. Some of My children in the past have been blessed with this, some have been blessed In other ways. You are My Son now as you have given yourself to me in so many ways. You have given Me your will, your free will, something I do not take from any of My children. Some give Me part of their will to retain control over most of their lives. I do not use them as I do you. You up are called by Me, by both My Son Yeshua and I your Creator. How blessed you have been by this, but yes also you have had a formidable force come against you to stop this established anointing you have achieved. We have been victorious over the tests and trials placed before you and you can feel confident out of the majesty you have in the Spirit of God.
Give your will to me and trust in Me your Father. I have held you back from many things because I know how to fix you, I know what is needed to heal you and restore you to the man I want you to be. Son, you will be so strong Spiritually, that is my intent for you. You cannot even perceive what is being built in you within your Spirit. You are not aware nor can you feel the ways I have charged and built up your Spirit to stand against the evils of these end times. Your flesh has squawked and cried out in frustration for the length of time this healing has taken, it just crazy you say to Me. I comfort you day to day and keep you moving along giving you Grace for the day as I strengthen you and keep building you up in the ways I know will delight you eventually. Your flesh in his logic from the world, not from the realm of the spirit, also is troubled for it is hard when you cannot see the results I have in mind as God your Father. I have the mind of God, you have the faith of My child and yet you are beginning to perceive what is happening in the Spirit. You are getting better and better each day and it is showing to you and it will bless not only you but it will bless others. Bless you my Son.
I do not want to make you responsible for vast amounts of prophetic information just now My Son. I will keep you well informed so that you will not be harmed. I have held you in the palm of my hand for quite a long time and I'm not going to let you go. My eyes are upon you and what you do. I am inspiring you with my voice every day and I will not remove it from you. We are working out the things of the flesh in your life very slowly so that you will be healed so very completely. Do not despair, all promises that I make to you I will fulfill. You will have a successful ministry in My Son's name, you will have your heart's desire In your success view of life upon the world. You will have peace with Me, your provider your Creator, Your Father. You will be content, just continue to listen to Me and all of my direction, rest in Me and I will lift you up to a height of Grace.
Your Father.

12-30-99

I encourage you to fear not. There is nothing to be subjected to that will harm you in the way you fear. Many events will be nonevents. I have plunged and held you in these lethargic resting times for your healing and for My benefit to be able to hold you down from stepping out wildly into projects and ill-fated plans that you may have attempted. I have held you back, back, back from moving ahead, that is what has frustrated you so much.
It is my purpose and will to have you away from work and pleasurable activities and the others busy things you had done so much of to make up your value in life. It is I who is responsible. It is I who knows it has been absolutely necessary and you are you to remain that way. I'm learning from you and teaching you. I am healing you and you are discovering yourself and the calm way I want and need you to be. You are obedient to Me and what I want you to do and I will reward you for your subjecting yourself to My will. Do not envy those around you living their lives to the flesh fullest now for they are the foolish, you are strong and storing up relationship with Me and knowledge of your Creator rather than running after every wind of indulgence the world craves. You are set apart now and in the end days you will be especially called apart. I know the plans of the last days, I know what direction your heart will take, I know the strength of your Spirit muscle anointing. I am your Father I know how these things come to pass. It will be for your benefit, it will be your life, it will be for your Grace, it will be for your Peace, it will be for YOUR fulfillment. You will be My all.
Your Father.

End of 1999